rhayne-a map of my planet

My Little Taro Beans

2012-01-29T19:25:00.000-08:00

He looks kind of disapproving, doesn't he? But really, he's just as fuzzy on the inside as he is on the outside. Ummm... sort of.

Except when he's mad at me. He lets me know with a swift thump to the floor with his back foot. Any number of things could cause him to do this. If he gets under my bed, for instance. He's not allowed in that room, and he knows it, so if opportunity knocks and he does make a run for it, he will hide under the bed and thump and thump as though he is telling me haha, you were too slow to catch me...now back off, lady!

He will also thump at me if I pick him up to give him a kiss on the cheek. I do this a lot... I can't resist. He hates being picked up, which is only natural...in the wild he would be a prey animal, so confinement of any kind is not comfy for him. So he tolerates me, but soon after I put him down, I get thumped.

But, if all four feet are on the floor he's a cuddly as can be. He loves to be rubbed under the chin and around the ears and will push his nose into my hand in demand ... but he rewards me by licking my hands or my forehead if I snuggle up to him on the floor.

Despite his little grudges, I love him. I adore him. I could gobble him right up I love him so much.

I am a Storm Chaser at Heart

2012-01-23T00:44:00.000-08:00

Winter finally arrived. It was like a thick and pillowy duvet blew off the clothesline and settled right over the island. But it only lasted 2 days before torrential rains washed away any evidence of white and left everything green again. Which is just about perfect. I love being snow stranded... it provides automatic permission to do nothing but cozy up with a blanket, hot tea and a good read. I love those kinds of days. And because they come so rarely in this little part of the world, it makes them even more delicious.

And just when we thought everything was returning to normal, the winds came today. Powerful 110 km/hr gusts that knocked down trees (I grieve for those that fall) and power lines (including mine) and made the ocean roar with rage. It was quite spectacular. In the eleven years I have lived here, I don't think I have ever seen winds that strong.

So I am wondering... what is coming next? Some pretty lightning? That would be nice. We don't get nearly enough thunder and lightning here.

I LOVE storms. It doesn't matter what kind. I love them even better than sun-in-your-eyes days. Better than hazy blue skies. Better than unrippled waters and swayless trees. They shake up the ordinary. They make our eyes grow wide and our hearts beat stronger. They wake up the spirit and make us feel oh so very small.

I will be scanning the skies for the next thrill ride.

What Holds the Light

2012-01-17T00:57:00.000-08:00

The sunlight is painfully shy these days... hiding behind Old Man Winter's knees, sneaking a peak every now and then... not wanting to be forgotten.

But if you are patient, she can be coaxed. You might find her wrapped snug around twigs and branches like a spool of golden thread. She may be filtering herself through the papery shell of a hydrangea, offering it one last day of grace. Or perhaps you will find her sweet talking the baby buds, making them appear to glow from the inside. Perhaps that is what they need... a little bit of a pep talk to encourage them to open when the air is still bitter cold. Poor things. I hope they know it is much too early to wake up. I want to whisper to them... go ahead. sleep in. take your time.

That timid sun. I know she has her days, whole seasons even, when she's bold and demanding of attention. But not now. The heavy clouds are intimidating, threatening snowfall, pushing her aside as they steal center stage. No doubt, the tiny snowflake is deserving of love and attention too. As much as we love the sunshine, who doesn't love a good snow day?

White Out

2012-01-08T15:13:00.000-08:00

I think I am detoxing. I am coloured out.

I love the clean slate feel of January. As wonderful as the holiday season is, when it is over, I am ready for it to be over. Funny.... that happens at the end of each season, too. So here I am, beginning again ... resurfacing after a long blogging slumber. Hoping to be more present with you this year. But I am not going to make it a resolution. Because, you know what happens to most resolutions.

No, I am thinking in terms of intention. To find more beauty... to share it with you ... to get more of that goosebumpy feeling when I see the beauty that you create in whatever form it is that stirs your soul.

I wasn't around a whole lot last year. I think I found it all too overwhelming. I found myself feeling very guilty much of the time because I wasn't keeping up with the goings on in the blogging world. It's a busy place, this beautiful universe we have all created with our art, and words, and pictures. And I am so happy that I found a little place within it. But, I'd like to try a different approach... little bite size pieces at a time, and less marathoning when it comes to trying to keep up with my favourite blogs. Do you know what I mean?

And yes... I also intend to take breaks when I need them. Long ones if I need them. I think I am getting better at honouring my own needs without judging myself for them. Makes me a happier being.

I am actually smiling right now. :)

Starry Nights and Feeling the Love

2011-12-20T19:20:00.000-08:00

Where did the last three weeks go? Looking back, I can't remember the details, the millions of little things that had to get done... but sprinkled here and there were wonderful gatherings with friends that are so near and dear to me.

One sweet friend has this Love mug. Every time I go to her house for a cup of chai, I ask for the Love mug. I think it makes the tea taste better. I think it makes me feel better. I think that even if it is all in my imagination, I still get all the benefits.

Last night I spent the evening with three of my favourite people. We went to a Christmas magical wonderland of gardens and lights in the theme of the Twelve Days of Christmas. We rode the carousel and went ice skating under the stars while soft celtic Christmas carols played in the background. A sparkly silver ball hovered above us, sending swirling twirling globes of light all over the ice rink. It couldn't have been a more perfect night.

And now I can take a deep deep breath, and I can drop my shoulders and relax, knowing that the busy part is over. And as I make my way to my family tomorrow, everything is going to slow down... and get quiet. I look forward to doing a whole lot of nothing over the next two weeks.

Wishing all of you a most beautiful Christmas. I love you all, and I will come around to visit and send you a warm holiday hug. xoxoxo

A History of Love

2011-11-27T13:29:00.000-08:00

There is a wonderful old bookstore downtown that sells mostly used books. I especially love to go upstairs and wander along the creaky wooden floors through the many tall shelves, eyes and heart open to whatever quietly beckons my attention. All this place is missing is a resident cat.

There is one small shelf that contains really old books. Some of them have the most beautiful covers. Like this one. I had to have it... I'm known to judge books by their covers, and I really only bought this one because of the cover. I had no idea what was inside until I brought it home.

The very first page, the very first few lines brought a smile to my face...

It is the fairy forest old,

With lime-tree blossoms scented!

The moonshine had with its mystic light

My soul and sense enchanted.

Yes. I was hopelessly enchanted. This little gem is full of beautiful phrases.

And that wasn't the only gift I found within its pages. In four different places, I found four leaf clovers, pressed within the pages oh so very long ago.

It makes me wonder who owned this book. No doubt, she loved it. Did she carry it with her everywhere? Did she lay in a field on a warm summer day, reading out loud the phrases that moved her, plucking clovers and tucking them into her favourite pages? Perhaps she was stowing away her good fortune for a less than perfect day. Was she in love? With one precious someone? With the world?

One clover was on a page containing this...

Immovable, unchanging,

The stars stand in the skies,

Upon each other gazing

With sad and loving eyes.

And it doesn't matter really, what page I turn to... each page is adorned with beautiful lyrics... this book of songs. I will devour it slowly. One page at a time. Perhaps there are other things hidden within these pages that I have yet to find.

ps.
If you would like to see the the critter I captured today in all her adorableness, head over here.

A Light Frosting

2011-11-20T12:35:00.000-08:00

Brrrrrrrr.... it's cold out there! Unusually cold for the island. I'm no early bird, and by the time I wake up in the morning, any signs of overnight frost have already melted into oblivion. But not today.

I found a wee patch of frosted moss and mushrooms. Actually, the moss is what caught my eye.... the mushroom was a happy surprise. A little gift from the winter faerie realm.

I am going skating this afternoon with some dear friends, which will be followed by a hot bowl of chilli and some chewy chocolatey brownies that just came out of the oven. The aromas floating around the room right now are intoxicating.

Frosty on the outside, warm and cosy on the inside... just the way I like it. November bliss.

Keeping it Simple

2011-11-13T17:21:00.000-08:00

I had the whole beach to myself today. I guess not many people love the cool grey weather as much as I do. I feel badly for them.

It may have been a bit moody outside today, but it was a serene journey along the shoreline for my spirit... my mind was quiet. In fact, I hardly thought about anything at all. What a beautifully satisfying thing! I was deeply present with myself and my stretching landscape... looking for objects of oceanic beauty, listening to the silent spaces between the waves, feeling the odd raindrop plunk upon my head.

I felt nourished. And my creative muse came along to stomp in the waves with me as well... I had forgotten all about my lensbaby, and decided it would be a perfect tool to explore the beach with today. I love the interesting views through that lens... a little bit surreal and otherworldly.

And as it started to darken, I made my way home where I knew that a cup of sweet chai and a warm cinnamon twist was waiting for me.

It's the simplicity of days like this that allow me to thrive. I don't think I was ever meant to live a full, hectic busy life... I think if I did, I would quickly shrivel up like that leaf up there, and fall between the cracks. It's just not my style.

Monochromatically Thinking

2011-11-06T21:06:00.000-08:00

Oh, November.... I didn't think it would ever happen, but you've managed to woo me.

It seems like a slate grey, dreary month sandwiched between two colourful, magical ones. Or at least, that is what November used to feel like. This year feels beautifully different.

There is still a riot of colour outside. Fall came late to my neck of the woods. And so, I can still weave myself between the trees, watch the leaves fall ever so gracefully and pretend it is still my beloved October. I had a hard time letting go this year. So it goes with most things in my life... I get too attached. But, as much as I love to bundle myself in the warmth of all that colour as I do my morning mountain climb, I turn away from it when my camera is in my hands. For the first time in a very long time, I find myself accepting November just as is.

I like the grey. I'm drawn to the pale pastel hues of an understated month. I am waiting for the sun to resign itself to the fog, so I can see the world in indistinct lines and soft shapes, and feel the hush of the earth as it prepares to sleep.

Stillness is what I crave. A little bit of down time before the holly jolly, making merry mayhem sets in.

So, November, I stand with open arms to you... accepting your quiet gifts... sheepishly wishing I had been more grateful in years past.

Black Cat

2011-10-31T00:10:00.000-07:00

A ghost, though invisible, still is like a place
your sight can knock on, echoing; but here
within this thick black pelt, your strongest gaze
will be absorbed and utterly disappear:

just as a raving madman, when nothing else
can ease him, charges into his dark night
howling, pounds on the padded wall, and feels
the rage being taken in and pacified.

She seems to hide all looks that have ever fallen
into her, so that, like an audience,
she can look them over, menacing and sullen,
and curl to sleep with them. But all at once

as if awakened, she turns her face to yours;
and with a shock, you see yourself, tiny,
inside the golden amber of her eyeballs
suspended, like a prehistoric fly.

~ Rainer Maria Rilke

It's All Gone Pear Shaped

2011-10-22T23:43:00.000-07:00

It is apple crisp time. I only make it in the fall. I only want to eat it in the fall, when the air is as crisp as that delectable sugary oat topping. I was given a bag of apples... a wonderful woman I know has two apple trees and a pear tree in her yard and this year she had more fruit than she knew what to do with.

I happily brought them home and knew exactly what to do with them. I started peeling and chopping. Inside the bag was one lonely pear. So in a spontaneous act of culinary creativity (I don't cook, so bear with me) I decided to add a pear to my apple crisp.

And I probably won't do that again. It just doesn't taste the same. Actually, come to think of it, I should have known better. As much as I love the voluptuous shape of the pear, and I adore that sweet little english phrase *it's all gone pear shaped* ... I'm not entirely smitten with them when it comes to eating them.

Except for bosc pears. They look almost rotten from the outside, all brown and plain. But they have a most satisfying sugary crunch. And that's just it....they have to be crunchy.

As I think about it, so do apples. Except when they get cooked up into a sweet gooey mess underneath a blanket of apple crisp topping.

Unfortunately, this crisp did go a bit pear shaped. Pardon the pun.

Funny how I keep reaching for a spoon, though.

Fernwood Adventures

2011-10-16T21:34:00.001-07:00

No other season seems to signify change more than Autumn. Maybe it is because the changes are so bold in nature this time of year. She's feeling kind of flirtatious, Mother Nature... and she wants to be noticed. As much as I love those brilliant hues that scream for my attention, I am drawn to the softness. The less flamboyant. The ones who whisper rather than shout.

I had a lovely afternoon with a new friend. We met through blogging, and now I had the pleasure of meeting her in person today. We sat in a cozy cafe, savoured a good cup of chai while listening to great tunes, watching interesting people come and go.... talking of life and adventure, embracing challenge and trusting the mysterious ways of the world. I would have been perfectly content to sit there for another hour or so, but our cameras were sitting impatiently on the table like restless children in need of some fresh air.

So we headed out to the funky, eclectic neighbourhood of Fernwood. Here you will find interesting old character houses painted every colour of the rainbow, community gardens and even little tomato gardens lining the sidewalks. The telephone poles are painted with flowers and butterflies, and real flowers are still spilling out of every nook and cranny... in October!

We grew quieter as we started watching the world through our lenses. Blissfully content as we happily snapped away. It was a perfect day. Clear skies, and crisp air (that strangely smelled like fennel...it was growing everywhere).

I did capture some bold fall colours too. But I will save them for another post... some future day when I need a little exuberance to brighten the rainy grey.

Coming Back to Center

2011-10-04T22:24:00.000-07:00

The world is too full of beauty to dwell in sadness for too long.

There will be moments, I am sure, where I will surrender to whatever it is that hurts. There will be many of them ... I feel deeply. And I love that I do.

But today, I stepped out in nature.... to be present with it, to accept its peace offerings. The natural world truly is the greatest elixir for a weary soul.

Breathing deeply. Accepting what is.
No matter what, there is always beauty. Everywhere. I am open.

Lifeboat

2011-10-01T17:31:00.000-07:00

Why is change so damn hard?

Change represents the loss of some thing, in place of another thing. Well, what if that other thing isn't what you hoped for? What if you really felt you needed the original thing? Is that the life lesson? To let go of things you think you need and be open to what comes?

Maybe. But I don't feel like being optimistic or philosophical.

How do I let my loved ones go with well-being in my heart for them when my own well-being is suffering?

This chunk of rock in the middle of the ocean that I have chosen to call home... this place that feels so much like home...how can if feel so lonely now? How did this island become so isolating? Can it still be home when my family is so far? What is home? The place or the people?

I feel as though I am being left behind. If this loss feels so intense, why am I the only one that seems to be feeling it? Is it because I am not the one doing the leaving?

Is my anger justified?
How about my sense of betrayal?
How do I keep resentment from clouding my sense of things?

Why is fear overriding love?
How do I turn it all around?

It is as though I am floating in a little lifeboat... but the paddles have drifted away from me. Lost to an overwhelming current much beyond my control. Can I learn to trust the tides to bring me back to a safe place?

My safe place. Maybe it will no longer be so?

My tears, the same muted colour of the sea.... an entity that used to sustain me feels like a barrier now to those that I love.
Where do I go from here?

The Sea, She Calls to Me

2011-09-09T22:37:00.000-07:00

I love to crush those little sea kelp bobbles under my feet. They make the most incredibly satisfying pop/crunch sound. I must have walked the beach a dozen times over the last three days, crushing every single one in my path.

I studied the sand and was amazed at all the stories it could tell. Man, beast and bird walked this beach before me and left their distinctive mark. Even the rolling waves left behind fine wavy lines along the hard packed wet sand.

The sun warmed my skin in the early morning hours, and the wind-swept fog fiercely blew in to add a bit of drama to the late day. The sun and fog seemed constantly at odds, yet they were so synchronistically beautiful in their unity.

After the stress of the weeks before, visiting my most favourite place on earth was a timely respite. I spent a lot of time on this beach thinking about what matters most in my life. How important connection is... whether it be to loved ones, or loved places, or cherished memories. I learned a long time ago that when I am really down, the one thing that brings me back is connection. I must connect to something ...anything that is meaningful.

And I must thank you all who connected with me last week and left such words of love and support as we waited for Ivy's test results. We now know that she will not need any further therapy. No chemo, no radiation.... in fact, she got to go home! And the prognosis is good. Tumours like this rarely return.

I am slowly making my way to each of you. Taking my time to truly catch up with you and see how you are doing this beautiful September. Fall is on her way, and I can't wait... my favourite season. I am ready to embrace the changes she brings.

Bittersweet

2011-09-01T22:55:00.000-07:00

We went to see my brother and his family.... my mom and I. It's becoming a bit of a yearly tradition, this road trip. This summer there was the sweet, delicious charm of my two year old niece Sarai. And her new baby sister Ivy. Little Ivy.... what a beautiful creature she is.

We ate berries and other goodies from the garden. We devoured fresh peach pie. We lingered the afternoons away in hammocks and wished upon fleeting comets as we slept under the stars. We drew on the sidewalk and made friends with imaginary dragons. I held sleeping Ivy in my arms and wrapped myself in the absolute perfection of her soft scent, quiet breath, her peacefulness.

Everything was beautiful.
I'm so glad in that brief space of time I didn't know what was to come. It was three days of ignorant bliss. I took for granted how good things really were. Or did I? I remember being very acutely aware of how precious this time spent with my family was. How I would always remember exactly how Ivy felt as she slept in my arms, how I would laugh later at the funny things Sarai said. But despite my gratitude, I didn't realise then how fragile life can be, and how quickly things can change.

A couple of weeks later, the world would turn upside down. Last Friday, to be exact... we found out that our little Ivy had a tumour on her kidney. A very large and aggressive tumour. How does this happen? How does a mass the size of a grapefruit grow inside a tiny perfect brand new 7 week old body?

It has been a week of little sleep, agonizing waits... for scans, and test results... and today there was surgery.

And I have to say, after so much angst and worry, I feel as though I am floating off my chair as I type this. Those incredible doctors (magic-makers, really) were able to remove the entire tumour today, along with her kidney... but it was completely contained and hadn't spread to her other organs.

RELIEF.

We still need to wait for test results to see what kind of tumour it is and what steps will need to be taken next...

But. She's ok. She's going to be ok. And the world is slowing turning right side up again. And those beautiful stars will continue to shine. Any wishes I have now have already been fulfilled. What a generous universe.

I think Sarai has it all figured out. She celebrates life every day. You should see this girl dance....

Please go here if you would like to see more pictures of my two favourite sweet peas. :)

Saltspring Island

2011-07-11T18:47:00.000-07:00

Hello, my friends. How is summer treating you so far? I know that it is luring me away from the computer and enticing me to go outside and play.

My friend and I spent part of the weekend on Saltspring Island, which is just a short ferry trip from Victoria. It is an eclectic little island brimming with artisans and creatives of all types, and every Saturday in the summer, many of them gather for an outdoor market the central village. I drooled over beautiful pottery and jewelry, tried the most delicious pesto kale chips ever (never thought I would like kale, but I am determined to make my own now), and happily wandered about in the sunshine, soaking up the local sights and music.

When we'd had enough of the crowded spaces, we found ourselves snug inside the Tree House Cafe devouring a delicious and nutritious lunch underneath the branches of a giant tree. The entire cafe was built within this tree. What an amazing place...and the food was fantastic.

We eventually moved out of town and drove around the island in search of interesting things to photograph. As we traveled down pretty tree-lined curvy roads, we found other cosy cafes, fields of sheep and lamas, ocean piers and funky houses. Almost every one had a sign out front...fresh eggs, natural honey, pottery, fruits and veggies, you name it. Anything you needed, you could find on this little island of abundance.

I found myself imagining what it would be like to live there. I think I could be very happy on an island like that...at least in the summer months. A weekend cottage would be oh, so perfect.
I look forward to returning for the fall fair in September, when I can dream a little more.

From Your Daughter...

2011-06-19T13:39:00.000-07:00

He has a soft spot in his heart for crows.

He has a quiet, subtle sense of humour that cracks me up.

His idea of cooking is throwing every left-over from the fridge into the frying pan... all at once... almost always mixed with scrambled eggs.
But he can make a masterpiece of a pizza.

He taught me to ride my first big kid bike, how to get up on one waterski, took me for my first driving lesson (it didn't go well, but at least the car came back to the driveway fully intact), taught me all about the colour wheel, composition and perspective, and tried to teach me to draw, yet I still can't draw a stick man to save my life. Thanks for trying, Dad.

He is the most patient person I know.

When I was little, he used to set up a small easel next to his so I could paint with him.

He's a chronic whistler. He gets that from his dad. He listens to music as he paints, forever whistling along. The best part is when he fills in melody gaps in songs with his own little improvisations. It's really quite endearing.

He has an impressive knowledge of music and knows good music when he hears it...always open to what is new to his ears. What we listened to when I was young has had a strong influence on what I listen to now.

He gets giddy and child-like whenever he gets to purchase a new techy kind of gadget. Then he will spend hours meticulously learning every detail from the instruction manual.

There is no one on this planet I feel safer with to drive me from point A to point B in the snow.

I love you so much, Dad. Happy Father's Day!
xoxoxoxo

I'm Feeling the Flurry

2011-06-14T13:44:00.000-07:00

June is blur of activity. One more week of craziness and then I can slowly settle into the quiet dreamy glow of summer. It's piano recital time. Not my favourite time. I feel like a nervous parent to each of my students as they prepare for their performances on Saturday.

These flowers remind me of all the smiley happy faces of family and friends that will make up our audience...faces peeping between other faces, eager to see their child walk to the piano, place their hands on the keys and share with everyone what they've learned this year.

Ooohh, I can't wait until it's over. It doesn't seem to get any easier each year, and I am learning to accept that. I am anxious because I am invested in these kids...and that's a good thing. It's well worth the butterflies.

One Beautiful Thing ~ twenty.eight

2011-05-31T00:09:00.000-07:00

~playing with one of Kim Klassen's lovely textures~

The month of May is coming to a close, and so is my little project. I hope it has brought you a bit of happiness, a little sprinkling of quiet beauty throughout your spring days.

Yellow is the colour of friendship. I offer this flower to you... to each of you who have been by my side throughout this month long journey. I am so grateful for the friends I have made in the blogging world over the last few years...there is nothing more beautiful than connection, whether it is in person or in spirit. So really, I couldn't do a month of beautiful things without you being a part of it. A big part of it, as this would be a very lonely little blog if it wasn't for you. Thank you for your love and kindness. You are all so so beautiful.

xoxo

One Beautiful Thing ~ twenty.seven

2011-05-30T00:10:00.000-07:00

I don't take landscapes very often. I think it is because my eye sees the same places all the time, so I have a hard time finding something extraordinary enough within the scene that entices me to photograph it. But when I come across a scene like this one, it's hard not to find the beauty. I couldn't help thinking about my dad today as I captured this old boat.

My dad is an artist. He looks for things like this to paint. When I was younger, every time we took a road trip, we would often find ourselves parked on the side of the road while my dad got out to photograph something interesting that he could work with in a future painting. He was, and still is, drawn to old collapsing barns, battered old roofless shacks and abandoned boats. Sometimes I would get out of the car to watch him... and I could never understand why it took him so long to take the picture. He would stand there for what seemed like eons, looking through the lens before I would finally hear the shutter click. And I must say, to this day, I have never heard a better sounding shutter than what came from his old film camera. I wish my camera sounded like that. I think I used to stand next to him more to hear that sound than to see what he was photographing.

But now I know better. Now I know how long it can take sometimes to find the right composition. To find just the right angle. To make sure my settings are right before I take the picture. While most of the time I am snuggling in, getting close and personal with my subject, today I learned that sometimes it's best to step back a little and take in the whole scene. And I am learning to be more patient.

I had no idea back then, watching my dad, that I was taking my very first photography lesson, and that he would be my first teacher.

One Beautiful Thing ~ twenty.six

2011-05-29T00:38:00.000-07:00

When I get too snug within my cocoon, when things get a little too safe, and I feel as though I am not growing or expanding or creating new experiences in this precious life of mine, I must remember how brave the flowers are. They confidently burst out of their papery shells and bloom most abundantly, so sure of themselves in this time and place that belongs to them. We would never know their beauty if they stayed hidden. They might be safer, perhaps...but not truly living.

One Beautiful Thing ~ twenty.five

2011-05-28T00:09:00.000-07:00

I think this picture speaks for itself.

I humbly apologize for any sudden, unexpected cravings this image might induce. You probably had your guard down when you decided to visit today.

But did you really think I could get through the month without a cupcake post?!

;)

One Beautiful Thing ~ twenty.four

2011-05-27T00:16:00.000-07:00

Feathers are magical objects. A bird's wing is a catcher's mitt for clouds.

How can something so fine and weightless lift a creature from the earth so it can skim the windy sky?

I wish I could fly.

One Beautiful Thing ~ twenty.three

2011-05-26T00:38:00.000-07:00

Tell me... what are the deepest wishes of your heart?

My body is yearning for stillness, so that it can hear the quiet rhythms beating like a butterfly wing against my soul. This little heart of mine is asking me to trust... to not be so afraid... to move towards anything and everything that brings about a greater sense of love, so that I may expand and become more loving. I may lead a simple life, but my heart is anything but simple. The things that have been etched upon its fragile surface are permanent and irreversible... whether they are the marks of pain or joy, they continue to shape the nature of my becoming.

One Beautiful Thing ~ twenty.two

2011-05-25T00:13:00.000-07:00

Have you ever seen eyes like that?

I bumped into her yesterday while walking in an unfamiliar neighbourhood, looking for interesting things to photograph. Actually, she bumped into me. And continued to collide with me as I tried to take her picture. She took my breath away. I have never seen eyes that colour. That green. My absolute favourite shade of green...the colour of lime popsicles.

She was such an affectionate cat...so much so that I felt guilty for having to eventually abandon her. Well, her owner was right there...and she told me her name, but I have forgotten now. But still, walking away from a creature so open to love made me feel lonely for her as I walked away.

I am allergic to cats, and normally keep my distance. But I couldn't resist this little beauty. Oh, I wish I could have eyes that colour! It was worth the sniffles and sneezes. This day, I had to settle for itchy red eyes. Reality and reverie sometimes don't coincide.

One Beautiful Thing ~ twenty.one

2011-05-24T00:07:00.000-07:00

Oh, yum.

The local ones aren't ready yet. But I am impatient. And they were on sale at the veggie market near my home. I couldn't stop plucking them from the bowl and munching on them as I was photographing them. I think they are my most favourite of my favourite foods. Well, they are tied with watermelon and pomegranates...which I also picked up at the market today. It's going to be a hard decision come breakfast time. :)

One Beautiful Thing ~ twenty

2011-05-23T00:05:00.000-07:00

That orange sherbet coloured stone, second from the top is currently residing in my left coat pocket until I am ready to make a wish and release it back to the sea.

I find, more often than not, I am drawn to the rocky beaches. While soft sand feels good under the toes, rocky beaches have other gifts to offer your senses. The expanse of shape and colour is a feast for the eyes.

And for the ears... when I walked across this beach, not only did I love the deep hollow sound echoing under my shoes, but if I listened carefully, with each step forward I could hear little crabs scurrying below the rocks as I unintentionally disturbed their hiding places. Who knew, waiting for high tide could be so dangerous?

This was a tiny crescent beach, tucked into a series of rocky cliffs. I have spent entire afternoons sitting on the edges of those cliffs, looking down on the beach from afar...but this time I wanted a closer look. It was well worth the descent.

One Beautiful Thing ~ nineteen

2011-05-22T01:47:00.000-07:00

The world is so empty if one thinks only of mountains, rivers and cities; but to know someone here and there who thinks and feels with us, and though distant, is close to us in spirit - this makes the earth for us an inhabited garden.

~Goethe

One Beautiful Thing ~ eighteen

2011-05-21T01:12:00.000-07:00

You've gotta wonder....
If these bicycles could talk, what stories would they carry underneath their battered old tire rims? Who's feet cranked the pedals and turned the spokes? Who's hands gripped the handlebars and steered them towards their various destinies? Were their owners good to them? Were they the adventurous type? How many miles were explored? To me, they seem to be the velveteen rabbits of the wheeled variety...loved vigorously into their golden years.

One Beautiful Thing ~ seventeen

2011-05-20T00:04:00.000-07:00

I quickly captured this while sharing a hot chocolate with a dear friend in a favourite cafe. They make it with real melted dark chocolate. Oh my soul...it is decadent.

I never did see his face, but I didn't need to.... all of my maternal synapses were firing off madly in all directions. I mean, look at those chubby little dimpled fingers! And the cars on his little shoes? And the soft folds of his pant leg and stripy socks. Oh.

I was momentarily suspended in some kind of baby nirvana. It was a sweet moment, and I'm glad I had my camera with me. A reminder to carry it with me always...everywhere.

One Beautiful Thing ~ sixteen

2011-05-19T00:02:00.000-07:00

quietly blooming outside my bedroom window

One Beautiful Thing ~ fifteen

2011-05-18T00:01:00.000-07:00

I know...
I've already posted ducklings this month... but who couldn't use a double dose of duckling? Aren't these two just completely happy-making and awwwww inducing?

Don't they make you feel like everything really is ok with the world?

One Beautiful Thing ~ fourteen

2011-05-17T02:03:00.000-07:00

The rain is steady and unrelenting....and expected here. If the sun comes out, it is an added bonus. But I kind of like the grey when I am at this beach. It draws out my deeper moods, my melancholies which I have grown to respect and embrace. Yes, I am quite comfortable in my greyer shades of being.

When I come to this place, I am often moved to tears. It has a power over me, and offers me an overwhelming sense of being home. I belong here. No other place on the planet makes me feel this way.

The rains were heavy yesterday, but I could only stay indoors for so long. I hovered near the windows like a restless child, anxious to be in the fresh open air. Ultimately, it was the sandpipers who enticed me to come out and play. I left the warmth of the fireplace, the company of my friends and ventured out to the calling sea.

And as I stepped into the moving water, I could see reflections of myself within the giant bubbles that rolled in with the surf...a girl in her rainboots, holding a blue and white umbrella, the wind teasing and twisting her hair as she scans the beach for sand dollars...contained in each bubble, the silent silhouette of a girl most at home within the sweeping tides.

My visit wasn't long enough. But then again, it never is. I am always longing for the next time, so very very grateful that there will be a next time. I take comfort knowing it will always be there, waiting for me.

One Beautiful Thing ~ thirteen

2011-05-13T14:19:00.000-07:00

Oh, the quaintness and charm of flowers in a windowsill. I love the way people adorn their windowsills with the things most dear to them. I sometimes wish I could borrow their things and put them in my window for a little while.

As most of you know, Blogger decided to take a bit of a vacation yesterday. I am going to follow suit. I will be away for the next few days...going to my most favourite place on earth. I will be back first thing Tuesday morning with a collection of beautiful things from my trip.

Have a most beautiful weekend. xo

One Beautiful Thing ~ twelve

2011-05-11T23:40:00.000-07:00

From my high vantage point, this might be a little toy boat that I could pluck from the water with two fingers.

But no.... it's real... with real people on it... living a dream.

All that open blue and sparkle... could you imagine?

One Beautiful Thing ~ eleven

2011-05-11T00:37:00.000-07:00

There is nothing I love more than a few quiet hours to escape the outside world to begin a brand new, long anticipated book. I love to feel the weight of it in my hands, and gently open the cover to see what lies inside. There is a subtle satisfaction in the turning of pages.

But something strange comes over me when I venture into the first few pages of a new novel. A carefulness.... a special attention to detail. I will sometimes go over the opening sentences a few times, just to make sure I haven't missed anything... to make sure that my imagination is forming the right opening picture for the story. And then, as I am reading, I realise that I am doing this, and I get all distracted and start from the beginning all over again.

It's just a temporary thing. Once I turn the first page, a normal reading flow begins, and I naturally sink into the story.

Does anyone else do this? Or is this just a quirk belonging only to me?

One Beautiful Thing ~ ten

2011-05-10T00:06:00.000-07:00

No need to build a nest up high on a branch when your home is this tall!

Ok, so it's not practical, and winged creatures don't need ladders...
but isn't it adorable?
Thank you Alison, for letting me borrow your gorgeous birdhouse.

One Beautiful Thing ~ nine

2011-05-09T00:24:00.000-07:00

I spent a good part of the weekend wandering through several different outdoor markets. There were so many things clamoring for my attention.... pottery, jewelry, handmade knits, organic soaps, baked goods, fresh local produce and flowers. And this is only the beginning. I can't wait to return when the berries are ripe!

One Beautiful Thing ~ eight

2011-05-08T02:00:00.000-07:00

She has a hug for everyone.

She can identify almost every flower and bird species known to man.

She has an adventurous spirit who embraces change, always anticipating the next turn in the road.

She has creative hands... whether she is is building a whimsical birdhouse, applying paint to canvas, coaxing the flowers and veggies to grow in her garden, or whipping up a culinary masterpiece in the kitchen.

She makes a mean pineapple dessert.

She is an expert at not being a procrastinator when there is a job to be done...why didn't I inherit this gene?

She finds the most perfect gifts for people... always as unique as the person she is giving it to. She gives with such thoughtfulness and care.

She is so good at giving a compliment, but not so good at accepting one.

She hates hates hates lima beans!

She is loved by each and every duck, squirrel, woodpecker, deer, owl and bunny who enters her yard in need of a snack.

She never fails to show the people closest to her how much she loves them... she loves without reservation.

She is an old soul.

And she is the most Beautiful Thing.

I love you mom... so much.

Happy Mother's Day.

One Beautiful Thing ~ seven

2011-05-07T00:26:00.000-07:00

This month, I thought I would take you along to some of my favourite places. I love to roam around this beautiful park...especially in the spring and fall.

This time of year, the rolling hills are covered with wildflowers. A royal carpet of purple and green. And some little yellow buttercups here and there. And these pink ones...they are called Shooting Stars. Isn't that sublime?

It is a quiet place next to the sea, scattered with old Garry Oaks which are just starting to bud. And those old oak trees are why I love this place so much in the fall. When the leaves drop, their gnarly twisty trunks and branches are exposed, and they look haunting and lovely amongst the rich mocha hues of tall grasses and bramble.

Something about this place reminds me of my childhood, even though I didn't live here back then, and had never set foot on these beautiful paths. It's a place that comforts me like no other space.

One Beautiful Thing ~ six

2011-05-06T02:00:00.000-07:00

It is the things that are most fleeting that bring the most joy.

A magnolia bloom doesn't last very long... the petals can start to speckle before the flower has a chance to fully open. But how exquisite they are...like giant spring time snowflakes that don't melt right away.

Like the silky taste of chocolate on your tongue, or the brilliant sorbet sky at dusk, or the exciting thrill of a thunderstorm, or a shimmering bubble before it pops.... the delightfulness of these evanescent interludes is lost if we don't experience them in the here and now.

One Beautiful Thing ~ five

2011-05-05T00:38:00.000-07:00

I am a minimalist. I don't like clutter. I feel so much lighter and happier with less. Yet I still find myself collecting things....only a few things... like books and heart shaped stones and sea glass.

But like any serious collector, I am very selective. I won't pick up any old piece of glass I find lying on the beach reflecting beams of sunlight, putting on its best sparkle, trying to capture my attention. Amongst that starry display, I only choose the ones of a certain colour. The frosty whites, soft sage greens and icy blues. The blue ones are rare gems.

It amazes me that something so benign as water can shape and alter things so dramatically. Billions of tiny droplets unleash from a cloud to turn streams into raging rivers....those same droplets are capable of sculpting canyons out of rock walls...and the sea, containing unfathomable numbers of tiny droplets smooth sharp glass edges into polished stones. How many times must a piece of broken glass be thrown against the beach, dragged out to sea, then thrown at the earth some more before it becomes rounded and water etched? It is almost as though the sea is trying to turn the glass back into sand again...as though it prefers it in its most natural state.

Water and rocks have had a tumultuous relationship for a very very long time. And I love to reap the benefits.

One Beautiful Thing ~ four

2011-05-04T00:45:00.000-07:00

Meet Dollie the Bulldog, Bella the Bassett and Charlie the Jack Russell.

I bumped into this rambunctious trio on the street this past weekend, and their owner graciously let me photograph them. Charlie was a bit camera shy, but the other two were naturals in front of the camera, and so full of character.

I have never owned a dog, and I don't know if I ever will, but I LOVE other people's dogs. They make me happy. I think it is especially great that I get to enjoy them without having to be the pooper scooper.

Dogs live in the moment.... and they love unconditionally. They are chronically happy creatures.
They could probably teach us silly humans a thing or two.

One Beautiful Thing ~ three

2011-05-03T00:10:00.000-07:00

I wish this little apple tree was in my backyard. What a perfect little hideaway. I would put a blanket right under it, lie on my back and breathe deeply. Oh, could you imagine the fragrance of the air under that tree? And the blossoms would look so pretty against the sky.

I would linger there much of the afternoon, plucking those dandelions and scattering my wishes across the orchard grasses.

I could also see myself picnicking there...some little sandwiches, some ripe fresh fruit, a little chocolate.

And some poetry. Yes.

One Beautiful Thing ~ two

2011-05-02T00:10:00.000-07:00

~pink ~

cotton candy * bunny ears * berries and cream * magnolia * morning sky * bashful * sweet pea * piglets * watermelon * fairy dust * birthday girl * cream soda * bubble gum * modesty * ballet shoes * sakura * valentine * strawberry milkshake * blush * petal soft * ice wine * lip gloss * marshmallow * baby shower * petits fours * winter cheeks * innocence * first kiss

One Beautiful Thing ~ one

2011-05-01T00:35:00.000-07:00

Even baby ducks know that a good start to the day, or even a fresh new month, is a good stretch.

I live near a little pond that fills to the brim with lily pads each spring. It is so dense with green, that the little ducks can't swim around them. There is nothing more adorable or entertaining than watching tiny flippers and fuzzy bums pitter patter across the lily pads, peeping for each other as they try to regroup in more open water, catching flies on route.

It must be the stretching that keeps them so nimble.

Small is Beautiful

2011-04-27T13:53:00.000-07:00

I have flown from my nest temporarily...I am guest posting on this lovely blog today. We are talking about passion...go have a look!

But I do want to write a little bit about my current thoughts, and the direction I want to take on this blog of mine...

I have been thinking about the world we live in, how chaotic things seem to be, how destructive we humans can be to ourselves, to others and to our fragile and precious environment ... Maybe I am oversensitive, but I can feel the weight of it on my soul. And I've been thinking about what I can do to counter it, because I am well aware that what I focus on expands.

Let me just say that I am also well aware that there are many many kind and loving and compassionate people all over our beautiful globe who are making things better each and every day. Amazing things happen every day. But why do we hear so much more of the negative? Why is the news so over-saturated with stories of doom and gloom? It gets me down sometimes, you know?

I know that I can't change the world no matter how many lightbulbs I turn off, no matter how many containers I recycle, no matter how frustrated and down-right devastated I feel with the human race and its capacity for cruelty. But, I do have the ability to change my mindset and put my focus on all that is positive and nurturing. And I can share it with others, so that we all feel a little less of that negative weight on our shoulders.

For the month of May, I want to share a daily project with you. Each day, I will post one beautiful thing. One photograph, one movie, perhaps a few words, some days maybe no words...One thing that reflects on what is good and true and beautiful to me, in hopes that it will carry itself forward and fill you up with goodness. I want to create a ripple effect. And I invite you to share with me what brings you peace within the crazy. What makes you happy? What allows you to tune out the negative and absorb the beauty?

My first post will be May 1st.
Perhaps it will be a month long project, but it just might become a much longer journey on this blog. I am hoping it will turn the tides within my thought streams, and bring you a tiny touch of happiness as well.
Please come with me...

Homes for Birds and Other Things

2011-04-18T11:42:00.000-07:00

Right outside my front window grows a small rhododendron tree, which has become home to a hummingbird family. I'm not sure if this is the same hummer that I photographed in the snow not too long ago, but I have grown attached to her and feel as though I have become as protective to this wee little nest as the parents that tend to its tiny contents. I didn't want to disturb her, even to take a quick photo, but hummingbird nests are so tiny and well hidden, and so precious....this was a gift I just had to capture. This calm and patient little creature is going to make a wonderful mother. The eggs should be hatching any day now.

It amazes me how neat and tidy their nests are, and how the lichen from the supporting branch has taken root and surrounded this little cradle of spider web and moss. It looks as though moss can have many more uses than just a soft carpet for forest creatures. It can even make boots soft and fuzzy once again. ;)

Please come on over and visit The Four. We are back! Spring has inspired us to begin again...we will be posting a new quote and set of photos every second Sunday. I can't wait to see what beautiful things we collect together over the coming months.

A Poem for Dreamers

2011-03-26T22:21:00.000-07:00

Wynken, Blynken, and Nod

Wynken, Blynken, and Nod, one night sailed off in a wooden shoe;

Sailed off on a river of crystal light into a sea of dew.
"Where are you going and what do you wish?" the old moon asked the three.
"We've come to fish for the herring fish that live in this beautiful sea.
Nets of silver and gold have we," said Wynken, Blynken, and Nod.

The old moon laughed and sang a song as they rocked in the wooden shoe.
And the wind that sped them all night long ruffled the waves of dew.
Now the little stars are the herring fish that live in that beautiful sea;
"Cast your nets wherever you wish never afraid are we!"
So cried the stars to the fishermen three - Wynken, and Blynken, and Nod.

So all night long their nets they threw to the stars in the twinkling foam.
'Til down from the skies came the wooden shoe bringing the fisherman home.
'Twas all so pretty a sail it seemed as if it could not be.
Some folks say 'twas a dream they dreamed of sailing that misty sea.
But I shall name you the fisherman three - Wynken, Blynken, and Nod.

Now Wynken and Blynken are two little eyes and Nod is a little head.
And the wooden shoe that sailed the skies is a wee one's trundle bed.
So close your eyes while mother sings of the wonderful sights that be.
And you shall see those beautiful things as you sail on the misty sea,
Where the old shoe rocked the fishermen three - Wynken, Blynken, and Nod.

~Eugene Field

The Sound and the Fury

2011-03-13T16:05:00.000-07:00

There's something about a wind so strong that it almost knocks you flat over sideways. So much power. It makes you feel so small and insignificant. It fills you with awe and complete surrender to any sense of control you think you might have. We really truly are at Mother Nature's mercy.

Usually I like to watch these kinds of winds from the comfort of my living room window, but today I went out and felt myself drown in it, and it was so amazing. I walked down to a favourite beach and listened to the water roll over the small stones. It is such a satisfying sound...kind of like bubble wrap or ice crackling in a glass. It almost sounds as though the rocks are hollow. To an ant's ears, it must be forbidding. I wonder how many stones are on that beach? There is a finite number...a number I will never know.

I think there are just as many knots in my hair now. ouch.

Rambling on Green Trails and Blog Posts

2011-03-06T23:32:00.000-08:00

It's getting late, and gravity is pulling on my eyelids... but I wanted to share some pictures of Thetis Lake, a most beautiful, greener than green place that I hiked with my friend and her dog Triscuit today. In the bottom photo, doesn't it look like some glittery mystical creature is hovering just under the surface of the water? Anyway, this is usually a quiet place, but today it seemed as though every dog in Victoria was trouncing along the trails, creating little canine traffic jams every so often. This was positively blissful for Triscuit, as were the muddy streams and mossy off trails. I don't think I have ever known a happier dog. Ever. And that kind of happy is contagious. I am still feeling the effects, hours later.

But I am sleepy too.
It is time to hit the pillows and let go of this perfect Sunday.

I owe you all a visit. You know me...always falling behind. I have come to realise that this is how I live my life. It's not just a blogging thing. I am always connecting and then retreating, never really finding a happy balance, but constantly flowing toward or pulling away from the world. Perhaps that is a kind of balance in itself? I don't know. I do know that I need a lot of down time, a lot of quiet space to recharge my batteries... I just have to make sure I don't cave dwell for too long....for that is not happy-making.

So I will put on my social butterfly wings (mine are removable) and let the breeze carry me in your direction over the next few days.

Happy March, everyone! xo

A Spring Metaphor

2011-02-27T16:17:00.000-08:00

Imagine starting out in life like this... as a magnolia tree's soft finger tip, reaching out to touch the sweet restorative spring air to sense if it is time to open. And when you get too warm for your winter coat, your downy pod gently opens and delicate pedals reach out, fragrant and receptive to the varying shades of daylight. You are a new flowering fledgling, born of fuzz, evolving into feathery white wings, elegantly perched upon the limb of a most beautiful tree.
That would be a life, most divine.

The Reward for Patience

2011-02-23T16:02:00.000-08:00

I have been wishing upon every stray snowflake that I would wake up one morning to a cumulation of winter white. And this was my morning. Finally! I was beginning to think it wouldn't happen, but the snow gods have apparently heard my incessant begging and pleading, and graced us with a real taste of winter.

My car is stranded at the bottom of our very long and steep driveway, and it looks like it will stay there for several more days. So, I took my camera outside my front door where I could hear the hummingbirds chattering in the rhododendrons. I make sure to keep them fed this time of year when their little bodies need it most, and they get quite aggressive as they fight for rights to the feeder. If only I could reason with them and tell them that there is plenty for everyone.

I could hear this sweet little one muttering her annoyance with the snow, but it took me a while to find her amongst the heavy white branches. But there she was, in a little opening, perched upon a tiny twig, watching me as I watched her. She allowed me to get quite close...perhaps a favour for keeping her belly full.

Tomorrow, I might wander further than my front door. I must take every opportunity to capture the snow before these beautiful crystals turn to water and wash away all signs of a fleeting winter. The hummingbirds will be grateful to see it go, but I am happy as a wobbly penguin on this long awaited snow day.

Words are my Elixir

2011-02-20T15:26:00.000-08:00

It has been a quiet weekend. I've been sniffling through a cold, taking it slow, withdrawing from the world, spending a good deal of my time with an open book in my hand. This is what happens when you work with kids....they are bug magnets, and sooner or later, no matter how healthy my lifestyle, I get bugged. Thank goodness it is mild. And I am grateful that the worst of it occurred during the weekend, when I had lot's of time to slow down and let my body heal, without the pressures of having to go to work. I'll worry about that tomorrow. Hopefully one more good night sleep will lessen the angst.

For now, I can lose myself in other netherworlds. Stories on the page, stories on film...oh, I love a good story. The stories inside my dreams have been pretty astonishing as well. Last night, I found myself in a place I go to often in my dreams, gazing up toward a massive swirl of stars, churning quickly as though caught in a whirlpool in the twilight sky....not quite dark, but dark enough to take in this faint and glimmering celestial wonder. I wasn't afraid, and I was the only one in my dream that seemed to notice that this was unusual and extremely beautiful. I know so much else happened during this dream...I can grasp a feeling or distant memory for a few seconds, but then it eludes me. How frustrating. I should have written it down this morning. But I never do....and I always forget.

I am glad for these little escapes into story when the body feels so crumby and uncomfortable. The mind can take us places and help us forget about reality for a little while. And hopefully a cup of warm tea will help me forget about my nagging cough. sigh.

Romancing the Senses

2011-02-14T00:16:00.000-08:00

I come to you with hearts and kisses...not just because I love you, my friends... but because I want to romance you.

One of my favourite authors, Sarah Ban Breathnach writes that love is the emotion. Romance is the evocative expression. Hmm..I love that.

A loving partner is not needed in my life to feel that my days are filled with romance. Little whims of it infiltrate my senses as the hours pass...

I see it in the sun rising over the ocean from my bedroom window, coaxing me away from my pillows, promising a day of new and unforeseen becomings.

I taste it in the cinnamon sprinkled generously upon my morning chai.

It sounds like the beautiful silence within my walls, and outside my open window.... and then the humorous break in that silence as I listen to the creaks and gurgles that come from my bunny's tummy as he drinks from his water bowl.

I smell it in the rain....the moist coastal air reaches deep within my lungs and fills them with dripping cloud.

I feel it in the calming presence of a smooth round stone in my pocket.... a simple object that keeps me grounded and present.

And speaking of stones, I sense it in the uncanny way I keep finding perfectly heart shaped stones amongst thousands of other surrounding stones, the same size and colour. I refuse to believe that this is a coincidence.

These are just fragments of one simple ordinary day. And how romantic it is, if I stay open to it.
But this special day will soon be charmed by the sinking of my teeth into a sweet and sugary cupcake, and perhaps a walk by the seashore...and a tossing of that smooth stone back into the waters where it first resided. It will be replaced by another. And then another...

And when this day begins to close its eyes forever, I will take pleasure in one last bout of romance.... the soft letting go... the abandonment of wakefulness as I fall into dream, trusting my bed to keep me warm and safe as I adventure into the night. Romance does not die with the fading day. The moon can be just as flirtatious.

Did the Snowdrops Tremble?

2011-02-08T09:36:00.000-08:00

I woke up late this morning and stayed under the covers, thinking for a great while about what I wanted to write about. I had this sweet little image of snowdrops that I took yesterday and wanted to post, but I had no words. My thoughts were then interrupted by a gentle shake. Then about three seconds of low rumble, and then another quick shake. No one had a hand on my shoulder trying to rouse me out of sleep.... my house was shaking.

I live in an area that is very earthquake prone. I have experienced 5 or 6 of them since moving here ten years ago...each one very different. I remember way back when I started blogging, I wrote a post about how much I loved little earthquakes. Just the little ones, because they were kind of exciting. My feelings have changed over the last few years. We islanders know that we live on a massive fault line...and that we are overdue for a big one. And I mean Big... a 9 or so on the richter scale. And while I know that this could happen anytime between now and the next 200 years, when I hear a low sound or feel any kind of vibration, my body freezes, and my heart starts to race.

I absolutely love living here. I couldn't imagine leaving. But I hate living in fear over this pending doom. It's not a question of if it will happen, but when. And considering I want to grow old here, chances are, I will probably experience one major shaker in my lifetime.

But you know, despite the fear, I have always wanted to experience the feel of an earthquake under my bare feet. I wish I could know when the next one is about to happen so I can go outside and stand in a field and feel the earth literally move under my feet. What would that feel like? Would the grass roll under my arches like the thumbs of a masseuse? Or would it be more of a tremble? Better yet, what would it feel like to lie down on my back? Would I be calm enough to do this? Probably not. I figure, a field would be an ideal place to be though. No trees or buildings to fall on you, and as long as the earth doesn't crack open and create a canyon right under you, what could go wrong?

If only I was psychic and could predict the timing of these things. For now, I will take the little 3.4 quake we just had, and be grateful it was so small. It was just the thing to get my lazy butt out of bed this morning.

Ice Cream Rescue Mission

2011-01-29T16:03:00.000-08:00

What's a girl to do when she's stuck at home, waiting for the fridge repair guy? Why, take pictures of things around the house, of course!

I was happily editing away, while he was taking apart, then reassembling something deep inside the abyss of my refrigerator... and now that he is gone, my ice cream is turning back into a solid state. I'm so grateful for people who know how to fix things. Everything is quietly humming the way it is supposed to...the obnoxious sounds radiating from that thing this past week were pinching a nerve.

As I type, I look outside my window to discover that I am floating inside a cloud. The fog is thick and milky outside, and the inspired half of me is ready to put my coat on and take pictures of trees fading into the dreamy white. But the smarter half of me knows that the falling drizzle is not good for camera equipment.

Besides, it's getting dark out there. I think I'll stay in. I have a few indulgent hours to settle into the pages of my book before I head off to the playhouse. It is supposed to be a performance shrouded in mystery tonight...how very fitting with all this fog.

Winter Woes are Fleeting

2011-01-22T19:48:00.000-08:00

For those of you who are winter weary ... who's knees are deep in snow and who's heavy hearts are yearning for the hope of spring, I went to find you some today. Not to worry.... little buds are opening, there are slight floral fragrances in the fresh January air, and hearts are finding their subtle way into my field of vision. Little messengers of hope, they are. They tell me that this long stretch of cold and dark is passing through, and behind it lies a wash of pastel hues and tender breezes. Each day, the sun becomes a little more hesitant to leave. It won't be long before we can feel her warmth on our skin once again.

Beach Assignment

2011-01-16T17:30:00.000-08:00

I had a serious craving today for taking pictures. It didn't look promising. The wind was howling, the rain was unrelenting and the dark sky made the morning look as though dusk had fallen. But, I walked with a friend and her little girl in the rain and took my camera just in case.

As I was driving home, this beautiful rainbow was directly overhead. It was though the universe was trying to tell me don't give up just yet...the day is still ripe for pictures. I stopped my car immediately so I could catch this rainbow, and then decided to take a spontaneous visit to the beach. Hope was restored.

I was telling a flickr friend a month or so ago, that there is a beach about 5 minutes down the hill from where I live, and even though it's so close, I never go there. I go to many other oceanside haunts, but for some reason, I neglect this particular beach. Well, she told me that was my next assignment.

So Kiersten, these pictures are for you...

Doesn't that orange kelp look like a tree? I found them strewn all over the beach. Well, there was an extreme high tide this afternoon, so there wasn't much of a beach, but I did my best.

On the way back up to the road, I walked along a stone wall covered in moss and lichen. I was awed by what I discovered through my macro lens. I am so glad the weather turned around today!

Assignment.... complete.
Craving....satisfied. For now.

Out of the Bud

2011-01-09T14:57:00.000-08:00

Hello, my lovely blogging friends. How are you keeping? I have a lot of catching up to do with you...I've been away awhile.

I feel as though I have been cheating. On my blog that is. You see, I spent the last week creating a new blog. Not so I can leave this one behind, because I quite like this one, and I love each and every one of you who come to visit, even you quiet ones who sneak in on tippy toes and choose not to leave your words behind. I am so grateful that you have found my space here and that you visit in whatever way works best for you.

This new blog is for my photography business. A place to put my portrait work. For clients to come and get a sneak peek at the photos from their session. I will create lifestyle posts there too, so that people can get to know me on a more personal level, but I just couldn't find a way to merge this blog and that one into one. They are entirely different.

So now I have two blogs to maintain. *gulp* What have I gotten myself into? But as daunting as it seems to me right now, I am very excited about it. So much so, I bought myself some pretty little white flowers today to put in my windowsill. Aren't they lovely? A quiet celebration. And perhaps, my soul is longing a wee bit for spring as well. And it's only January.

But so far, this year is full of hope....and it has already gifted me with new things. I feel balanced and happy, and that happens when I stay connected...to friends, to my passions, to my love for my work, to my health. I have made no resolutions, and I have not come up with a word for this coming year like so many of you do. I think I am someone who will choose freedom at any opportunity. I don't like being confined to a word, or to a task I have committed myself to. I prefer a more gentle approach. I will do what I choose to do at any given moment, and I give myself the space to change my mind. But I have general ideas about how I would like to shape the coming year. I think, most of all, I want to be kinder to myself. Just that one thing. How I will do this will evolve with the seasons, I am sure. And I love that.

So, I do hope you will visit my new space from time to time. I would be so happy to see you there. And I will make my way to you very very soon. I can't wait to immerse myself once again in your words, your images and your uniquely creative ways that inspire me so deeply.

See you soon!

Where the Treetops Glisten

2010-12-18T14:10:00.000-08:00

This photo was taken last year, in a sweet little town where my brother lives with his wife and beautiful little girl. Christmas last year was charming. Just my immediate family.... skating on frozen lakes, eating dried pears, soaking up the baby love (my niece's first Christmas), happily dreaming of moving to this adorable town, into a sweet little character home of my very own.

Maybe, some day I might find myself there. But not yet. I can't leave my island behind. I have grown some roots here. I've made some wonderful friends. And there are places I haunt that I just can't imagine myself parting with. The mountain I climb, the oak groves I wander, the rugged seaside trails I roam. The ocean is a powerful magnet. I think I truly belong here. If only I could persuade my family to move here instead.... but I know that they have built their nests in other places.

And I will see them tomorrow. In the morning, I will leave my cosy nest to see my closest family members. We will spend a few days together before the entire extended family gathers for a Christmas in the mountains. We get an old ski chalet all to ourselves...for all 44 of us. It's going to be crazy. And perhaps a wee bit snug. But, there will be skating and skiing and snowshoe trails to follow. There will be food and drink and plenty a merry making. There will be a Charlie Brown tree. And a secret Santa. And an abundance of snow to find the reindeer tracks in. Or perhaps, the bear prints?

And I will be blissfully capturing every moment of it with my camera. I can't wait to come back and share.

Have a wonderful Christmas, my friends.
Much love to you all.
xoxoxoxo

Ginger and Spice

2010-12-12T16:32:00.000-08:00

I wish I could bottle the scents that have infused the air inside my kitchen since I started baking this morning. It smells like Christmas...and I hope it lingers like glitter in the air.

I make gingerbread men for all my piano students every year, and I added a few whimsical stars for friends... but this was no easy task this time around. The first batch burned. I even had them in the oven for less time than the recipe calls for, just in case. The second batch was undercooked ( I was so afraid I was going to burn them again), and as I took the poor critters off the cookie sheets, many of them lost their heads and some legs and arms were unintentionally amputated. Sigh. I thought I had this mastered after 15 or so years of making these little guys. I am truly culinarily challenged.

But I persevered. I listened to Wintersong, and I whipped up a new batch that finally turned out the way I wanted them to....and now I am going to flop on the couch and watch Little Women before I make my way to a friend's house for dinner.

It's been an almost perfect rainy Sunday.

Have the Martians Landed?

2010-12-07T14:07:00.000-08:00

My thirty-sixth year on this planet has been placed in my internal filing system... nothing more than a memory now as I celebrate another birthday. And as my body gets older by the day, it's comforting to know that my sense of awe and wonder hasn't aged a day past childhood.

My mom comes to Victoria by train every year on the weekend closest to my birthday, and we share in a bit of girl time. This past weekend we unexpectedly found ourselves inside a new aquarium exhibit. We both left our adulthood at the door.

I couldn't take my eyes off the jellyfish! How could such a simple creature, with no brain or central nervous system look so exquisitely beautiful and complex? How does it know how to move through the water and eat and reproduce without a brain? How sad, to be so fluid and graceful in the water and not even have an awareness of what that feels like. No consciousness. Are they merely in the ocean just to become food for a bigger fish? Is that really their only purpose in life?

Maybe they do have a brain, or a way of perceiving themselves in space, but they are simply structured in a way that we don't understand yet. I would like to believe that. I'd like to think that they consider themselves the most graceful dancers in the sea, their long tendrils flowing like a summer dress, their translucent skin brilliantly illuminated by the faintest light source. That they can feel the gentle pulse of their movements through the currents, and sense their peaceful existence, even if it is brief.

I remember scuba diving a few years ago, when a tiny moon jelly appeared right in front of my mask. It was so still, and I became still as I watched it hover before me. I thought it was glowing with phosphorescent light and my eyes grew wide in astonishment until I realised it was just the light passing through it from another diver's flashlight. Nevertheless, there is something mysterious and beautiful about these simple creatures. I suppose they do have a deeper purpose... they have the magical ability to keep adult humans young inside...nourishing our intrigue for the natural world and its secrets.

Hush

2010-11-27T20:59:00.000-08:00

You will remember that leaping stream

where sweet aromas rose and trembled,

and sometimes a bird, wearing water

and slowness, its winter feathers.

You will remember those gifts from the earth:

indelible scents, gold clay,

weeds in the thicket and crazy roots,

magical thorns like swords.

You'll remember the bouquet you picked,

shadows and silent water,

bouquet like a foam-covered stone.

That time was like never, and like always.

So we go there, where nothing is waiting;

we find everything waiting there.

~Pablo Neruda

I find myself in the quiet.

I've been reading poetry. I've been reading prose.

I've been observing. A still being amongst the frenzy.

I've been taking pictures in the snow, then in the rain.... and briefly in the sun. And sometimes my camera can't tell if it is spring or fall or winter.

Snow falls, then melts into green a day later. Hydrangea petals turn brittle, yet moss grows ever more soft and brilliant. The fog sweeps in, then out, followed by the milky brightness of the moon.

Not much to say today.

Just quietly sharing with you, a touch of beauty.

Silk Parachutes

2010-11-21T18:40:00.000-08:00

Did you know that some spiders can fly?

There is a spider that can create a tiny parachute out of her lightweight web material. She will wait for a breeze to catch her and carry her vast distances, to some unknown destination....to some unknown fate. A new life in a completely unpredictable environment.

Scientists have found them way up the earth's atmosphere. Sometimes over great ocean bodies. When a volcano has decimated miles and miles of landscape, the first living creature that is sometimes discovered in these barren rocky wastelands are these tiny spiders.

That is a hopeful, optimistic little spider! Who knew they could be so adventurous?

Personally, I don't think I could live that way. I am too much of a homebody. As much as I love and fiercely protect my freedom, I don't like the feeling of being untethered. Without roots. I like to know where I belong.

But it does seem so fantastical, doesn't it? To be wisped away on a gentle current, your white silky parachute freewheeling through the upper atmosphere like a dandelion seed blown from its stem. Swirling and curling here and there until a sudden stillness gently releases you to a new garden, a new coastline, a new mountain top.... where you begin again. The world, a whole new oyster. And if you don't like your new digs, just make another parachute!

I wish I could coax the spiders that live in my house to try this way of life.

Whippletree and Beyond

2010-11-14T21:51:00.000-08:00

Last week, the grey drizzle brought about a softness to the day. This weekend, the cloud and fog enhanced the richness of things, deepened textures, and awakened the boldness of colour.

I feel as though I have just traveled a great distance. But really, I was only in my own backyard.... well, sort of. My friend and I went adventuring with our cameras, about an hour north of Victoria. Our first stop was Whippletree Junction...a small cluster of colourful old buildings that have been converted into shops and studios. It is a wonderfully bizarre place....a garden strewn with dozens of teapots, a courtyard surrounding an odd sculpture/wishing fountain made of old machinery parts, and long abandoned objects like an old printing press that have been left to rust and adorn the garden spaces.

After spending a great deal of time, utterly fascinated with the moss growing between the bricks, we moved on to a place I had never been to before. As soon as we drove into Cowichan Bay, I was enchanted with the place. I can't believe I have lived in Victoria for 10 years, and I have never seen this amazing little seaside village! There were organic bread shops and cafes, vintage candy stores and all kinds of funky little buildings along the small oceanside strip.

And while we were taking pictures of all these interesting things, I could hear a loud roar coming from the harbour. Then, many loud roars. So I walked out on the pier, towards the commotion, and there in front of me, on a neighbouring dock... a mountain of sea lions! Mostly sleeping, except for one or two loudmouths who had to let the entire town know their business. These guys don't smell pretty either.

One minute, they are snuggled next to each other, having an afternoon snooze....the next, wide awake, startled by a boat coming into the harbour. Except for that little guy on the right....he slept through the whole thing. The sound was amplified dramatically.

So, I moved on to more peaceful subject matter.

The day went by way too fast. These short November days are unforgiving to photographers seeking the light. The drive home was over a mountain pass, thick with dense fog and drizzle. But, as you know, this weather doesn't get me down....it brings me to life. I saw new places that tweaked my imagination and sense of exploration. And there are so many other places like this I have yet to discover on this beautiful island I call home.

Ever so Fine, What Falls From the Sky

2010-11-06T17:29:00.000-07:00

The drizzle outside my window this morning illuminated my houseplants. There was a gentle softness to everything. A foggy morning, bringing out the essential shapes of things...simplifying the landscape. I lingered for a long time, watching the rain fall so slightly it was almost invisible. And I would have been content to stay there even longer, next to my window... but I wanted to feel the rain. Smell the freshness of the mild coastal air.
So I went exploring.
I knew it was going to bring me gifts, this charming morning. As I drove toward my destination, the woman in the car in front of me, while waiting at a red light, made huge swooping movements with her arms as though she was conducting a symphony outside her windshield. I smiled at her through her rearview mirror...how could I not? She was not entertaining a child in the car, or laughing with another girlfriend....she was alone. Undoubtedly immersing herself in a piece of music that truly moved her.

I abandoned my car next to the ocean and walked up a street lined with beautiful character homes. Victoria is brimming with neighbourhoods like this. I like to walk and dream about my future life when I own a home like this. If it never becomes a reality, well, it's a beautiful dream for the here and now.

Garden flowers may be withering, heavy with Autumn rain, but seed pods are bulging with potential, waiting for their moment to burst open and bring new beginnings to spring pending.
And the ethereal lightness of others...like a warm breath on the dewy air.

Yet, there are still hints of colour. Blooms, not quite ready to call it a day.

Someone left their heart on a wooden pole. A bit worn and scratched, this heart has a story. Hopefully, the romantic soul who left it there hasn't abandoned love completely. They look like surface wounds. Nothing a little time and tenderness won't heal.

And now as the soft light evolves into darkness, I am grateful I stepped into the drizzle. There is a beauty in the greyness, a day most appreciated by a woman and her love of symphonic melodies... and a girl and her love of rainwater.

Autumn Swap

2010-11-04T12:38:00.000-07:00

I came home yesterday evening to find a package waiting for me. Don't you love it when you receive packages in the mail? Especially when you are anticipating their arrival? Sweet Relyn is hosting an autumn swap and she paired me with a lovely new friend Diane, who is currently living in Germany. I opened up the box and found many goodies inside.

She included a thoughtful card with such kind words. I discovered that she had been to my city a few years ago....if only I had known her then! In fact, the very first post I saw when I visited Relyn for the first time, years ago, it was a post about her visit to Victoria. What beautiful synchronicity. Once again, if only..... Maybe, if I am lucky, they might return one day.

Inside the box I found a jar of homemade applesauce. How tempting it was, to go grab a spoon and indulge right then and there. But no...I will save it for a special dish. It is not every day I get such a wonderful homemade gift. But I have to say, I did nibble at a few pieces of this divine rich dark chocolate that I found nestled in next to the applesauce. As soon as I took this picture, a few squares quickly disappeared.

And the book she sent....I love the worn feel of this book. It feels as though it has been loved before it reached my hands. It contains a collection of essays about books. Well, I absolutely LOVE books. I vow to never own one of those digital readers. I love the feel of them in my hands, I love to turn the pages, I could (and do) wander bookstores for hours....so as long as they continue to make real books, I will always stay loyal to the real thing. This book was written by a woman who "once found herself poring over a 1974 Toyota Corolla manual because it was the only written material in her apartment that she had not read at least twice." This is a woman who loves to read...it will be interesting to glimpse into her insights.

At the very bottom of the box were two gorgeous magazines. I poured through the pages, soaking up all the beautiful eye candy. These were some of my favourite images. Could I please have a rustic table and chairs next to a glass door like that? Could it open to a lush garden? With adorable little bird houses like these his and her's? I have been collecting images like this for a while now, as I try to uncover what inspires me, what my tastes are...they are ever changing, but I am learning more and more about myself as I go through this process. Lately, I have fallen in love with all shades of white. I dream to have a house of my own one day...a place I can lovingly create, make my own. But for now, I will use these inspirations I find as steps on the journey toward my dreams.

And that was not all that was in the box. I found some adorable little things to hang on my doors. There was a cute little mushroom made of fall leaves, an autumn wooden hanging that sounds like rain when the leaves collide with each other, and this little welcome hanging...Diane, how did you know it would go so well with the colours of my front door? So intuitive you are. ;)

This swap was great fun. And meeting someone new is always a gift. Thank you so much Relyn, for being such a caring and dedicated host, and thank you Diane for the lovely treasures you sent me from across the big blue sea. One day I would so love to see your corner of the planet. Germany has many charms.....and so do you!

Celebrating Debi

2010-11-01T08:14:00.000-07:00

Debi, today I celebrate you. I celebrate your newest published article in Artful Blogging, but mostly, I celebrate you. And what would a party be without a little cake? I picked up this cupcake yesterday, and dedicated every scrumptious bite to something beautiful in you...

The first bite... this was the sweetest bite. This one was for your love of words, which manifest into the most lyrical pieces of writing. You invite me to imagine the world you live in with all of my senses engaged. Not only can I picture the places you describe, but I can hear the curtains flitting with the breeze, I can feel the fallen tulip tree blossoms under my toes, and I can smell the rain approaching on a hot Texas night. The softest shades of blues and greens are all around me, so calming and peaceful.

The second delicious bite was for your attention to detail. You see fallen leaves that look like birds, you watch shadows move across the walls, the night sky tells you stories as you look up from your swaying hammock, you see hearts everywhere. You capture things with your camera that make me do double takes...that make me gasp with delight, when I see the hidden gem that you have brought into the light, just quietly waiting to be noticed.

This substantial bite is for your intricate creative process. Passion seems to drain out of you, through your paintbrush and sweeps itself across your canvases with wild abandon. Your calming, simple style is deceiving, for it is never a simple picture you paint. Intuition is your faithful guide...the very soul of your paintings.

This one is for the uncanny way you turn the most ordinary things into breathless beauty. Your entire blog is like this. The world, through your unique frame of view (and frame of mind) is extraordinary, and full of magic.

This last morsel packs a punch. It is for your honesty. Your raw, unapologetic, unedited, unfiltered honesty. You are the real thing, Debi. When you speak of loss, when you recall a memory, when you reflect what a certain colour does to your psyche, how the people around you affect you, when you talk about your charming neighbourhood, and how it is changing, how you dream of a new place to call home....whatever it is you are feeling, you speak straight from the most authentic places in your heart. When I read your words, my heart takes its own journeys, and I am grateful for the explorations.

Today, it's all about you.
You are lovely.
You are a meditation on living with soul.
You are a gift to us all.

Many thanks to sweet Amy for hosting this wonderful celebration today. What a beautiful heart you have.

Now I must brush off the crumbs, those delectable crumbs, and go looking for a copy of Artful Blogging for my very own. I can't wait to see what treasures are inside.

Happy Spooks Day!

2010-10-31T10:21:00.001-07:00

Pixie, kobold, elf and sprite,

All are on their rounds tonight;

In the wan moon's silver ray,

Thrives their helter-skelter play.

~Joel Benton

Have fun!

Stay safe!

For Keeps

2010-10-19T23:16:00.000-07:00

Sometimes you find yourself in a moment that seems to stand still for you, just long enough for you to be aware that this is a moment you will keep forever. You will never forget.

Sometimes these moments are little happenings.... nothing monumental. But something in it stirs you and coaxes you to imprint it into memory.

There we were, a week ago.... my mom, my dad and I, standing next to a deep slow moving stream. We came upon it by accident. It was a beautiful little spot, and as we gazed into the water, as if in a trance by the gentle current, my mom told me how she loves how the leaves, the ones that are submerged, how they tumble and turn underwater as they move downstream.

And all of a sudden, a new universe appeared before my eyes. Like a child seeing something for the first time. I have watched leaves float along the surface, but under the water...this was new. Well, it was new to my ever-increasing awareness of things. I stood there, mesmerized by these little leaves doing slow graceful somersaults deep down in the cold clear flow.

And then, disturbing the peace, was the child inside my dad as he launched a small stray tree trunk into the flow. He wanted to see how far it would go. Not very. It lodged itself between a tree and a rock wall on the far side, where it probably still remains. But inside myself, I laughed at this grown man, still curious and childlike at heart. Remnants of the little boy he used to be.

All three of us were briefly held captive by this little stream. We stayed for quite some time, observing and playing with the water as we watched for salmon, as rare a sight that day as a meteor in the night sky. And we gasped when we did see one large and lonely fish, resting in the slower pockets of the stream. And I gasped again as I caught a glimpse of these mushrooms growing on a floating log!

It was this quiet, uneventful afternoon....this fleeting fragment of time next to a stream that I won't forget. I felt such gratitude, to be with my family, to feel a sort of unity in our experience of that day. I felt loved and I felt loving. And all felt well in the world.

One of my dear friends just lost his father. And when he spoke to me of his final moments with his dad, one thing became very clear... the only important thing, all that really matters in the end is the love you share between those closest to you. I carried that in my heart that day as I walked with my parents. I am so grateful they are here with me, and that we can share these simple, unassuming moments like this together.

Yes. This is a day I will keep forever.

I Heart Fall

2010-10-02T16:07:00.000-07:00

Happy October my friends!

This is my most favourite month of the year. I am wrapped around this season like a warm fleece blanket. The air feels so fresh...so good.

And the trees have been turning ever so slowly. What used to sound like a soft wishhhhhh as the leaves flickered in the summer breeze, now sounds like a restless rustle. The leaves are indeed restless. I stood very still in a maple forest this afternoon and watched them fall. Some spun in rapid tight spirals, angry to be separated from the branch. Others twirled in open, loose circles like the graceful arms of a figure skater. And some were completely motionless, except for the slow, quiet drift to earth.

Have you ever been lucky enough to watch a leaf the very moment it separates from the tree? It's kind of like watching a meteor shower. Hoping that you will see that soft beam of light right exactly where your eyes are aimed at the giant sky. Usually you see a flash in your periphery and glance quickly at the fading star before it vanishes. Usually you see the leaf as it is already floating. I have yet to see one detach.

As I set up my tripod and peered through my camera, I would hear soft sounds as though a hiker was approaching...it was only the sound of the leaves settling after their graceful flight through the sunbeams. Little golden whispers, all around me. My only company as I settled into my solitude. Click here to see the images I captured today.

I was happy in those trees. So very much in the moment as I listened, and took in the scents that fall exhales. And as I silently expressed my love for the forest and its beauty, the forest told me how much it loves me too....down by my feet, next to the river, was this most perfect heart shaped stone. I couldn't stop smiling as I returned along the path. The stone in my pocket and a knowingness that love is all there is.

Just Sit There and Look Pretty

2010-09-22T22:24:00.000-07:00

She's a little beauty. Those big brown eyes could woo the heart of just about anyone. Her lashes are so long, they could sweep the dustbunnies off the floor. Her bouncy curls and pouty lips. And those sweet little toes peeking out from under her princess dress? You could kiss each one.

How will the world receive her?

Surely she will be adored. She will hear the whispers, the expressions of how cute she is when she's mad....how contagious her giggle is....how charming she is when she shows you her dance poses in her brand new pink ballerina shoes.

As she grows, she will catch the eye of many boys... on the playground swings as they double-dare her to eat grasshoppers....as they show off in front of her on the soccer field....a glance from across the room in first year history class....an office crush....love at first sight at someone else's wedding....

She will not be immune to the mixed messages she will receive in the world...on magazine covers, television ads, Miss Universe pageants, modelling reality shows, celebrity gossip grapevines...she will feel the ever-constricting pressure to be perfect.

But will she see past all that superficial garbage? Will she know that it is all surface stuff? Will she understand that what really means something, is the gorgeousness of her insides? How extraordinary she is? What it is about her that makes her so hilarious? What her hidden talents are that separate her from the conforming masses? How special she can make someone feel, just by being her beautiful self?

This little look she gave me...the way she folded her arms when I asked her to sit down in her fancy dress and let me take her picture... may she develop this subtle emotion, and use this little roll-of-the-eyes defiance when she is confronted with something that doesn't correlate with the truest parts of her being. A little attitude can be a powerful thing.

There's more to this beauty than just sitting pretty.

~Please go visit emmatree and find the other sitting pretty links.... an open invitation to see how many other collaborative bloggers are interpreting these 6 little words. Debi has created quite a gathering with this brilliant idea. And she is giving away one of her gorgeous paintings too!

The Love Bug Chronicles #1

2010-09-11T17:08:00.001-07:00

Who says magical realism doesn’t exist? I think it does.

Why, just yesterday, during a seaside walk, I saw so many things...

It all began with a click- clack- rattle- tattle sound approaching as a little red sports car whizzed past. An old car...vintage. Two seater. Bride and Groom. A just married sign in the tiny back window, and a string of dented tin cans bouncing off the pavement like a chorus line of tap shoes.

I walked along, edging along the shoreline and as the traffic noise drifted away, I noticed that the ocean sounded like a distant fairground. Screams of excitement were reverberating from a whale-watching zodiac doing donuts way out in the open water. It must have felt like a carnival ride at sea!

I came upon a grassy slope where people were flying kites. It looked like a Norman Rockwell painting, except for one beautiful anomaly... Standing there was an old man, who looked like he came from an exotic land far far away. He was dressed in colorful robes and a pointed cap and held two long sticks in his hand, joined together by a long string. He dipped the string in a bucket of secret potion and slowly separated the sticks, which were actually more like magic wands. Out flowed the most spectacular gigantic bubble the size of an elephant! Everyone stopped and watched in amazement. A little girl holding a kite jumped up and down, pointing her tiny finger in the air. It floated and morphed into beautiful shapes and fanciful colours and I smiled as I went on my way.

I went down the hill and around the bend, closer to the water when I saw couple sitting on the beach. The man was pointing to the water as they watched a stray bubble, a smaller one (small being relative...it was about the size of a basketball) hovering over the water, drifting and floating, eventually succumbing to its fate in a tiny explosion. The man looked behind him, puzzled...his eyes scanning for the source of the magic. It was like it appeared out of thin air.

It was like everybody was at play yesterday.

Including little red love bugs....for this one believes in magical realism too. I'm certain this is not the last you will see of her. The world is a big place... and there is a lot of road to cover. Today was a drive in the fall countryside. Cool crisp air and golden pie crust surroundings.

Who knows where she will venture next...

I'm a Newbie

2010-09-07T21:36:00.000-07:00

Well, I finally did it! Finally joined the masses and created a flickr account. Sheesh, it's about time!

I was hesitant for a long long time, for a number of reasons. But I've been thinking... many times I take pictures that I want to share, but no words come to me. Sometimes I just want to put my images out there and let others come up with their own stories.

Besides, I feel as though I am getting a wee bit lazy with my picture taking. I want to push myself a little and start taking more pictures. I want to carry my camera everywhere and post new pictures almost daily. I can't imagine writing a blog post daily, but I can see myself creating and sharing more images, and I am excited about that. So many of my photos get lost somewhere on my computer because I can't find the right words to supplement them, and then they are forgotten before I ever post them!

Over the last several days, I have become a bit of a flickr junkie. I am addicted to looking at other people's images (I'm sure I'm not alone here ;) and nothing is more inspiring. Nothing makes me want to pick up my camera more than when I see a gallery of incredible images. There are so many creative people out there!

I feel the need to take a great variety of different images. I tend to stick to nature photos on my blog, but there are so many incredible things to photograph in the world. I want to document the world as I see it.... little snippets of my personal daily life.

So I hope you will occasionally pop in and say hi. It feels a little lonely over there right now. I feel like a new kid in class. A stranger in a new world.

Which leads me to a few questions. Can someone tell me how to link to my flickr account from here? Does anyone know how I can make one of those nifty little moving mosaics that I can put along the side of my blog..they are so pretty. :)

And how do I find YOU on flickr? Can I add you as a contact? Is that how it works?

So many questions. But so many new things are free to manifest out of me now!

So excited!

(update...I now have a mosaic!)

The Last Petal

2010-09-01T22:41:00.000-07:00

It is at the edge of a petal that love waits

~ William Carlos Williams

I love me...I love me not...........I love me...

I have come to realize that almost every issue that I face in this life usually comes down to self love. When I am struggling with something, I try and remember to ask myself....am I coming from love, or fear? Almost every emotion stems from one of these. And more often than not, fear is the one that comes up for me. But as I am becoming more aware, I am choosing love... for the world at large, but especially for myself.

But I want to take it to a deeper level. I don't want to band-aid life's struggles with a hot bath or the distraction of a good book. Although these are things are nurturing, and make me feel better temporarily, the kind of love that I am talking about requires me to stretch a little further...go into the pain or the fear and wander around in there for a while....explore these familiar surroundings and learn more about myself and the way I cope with the heaviness of life. Without the help of that persistent and annoying self critic. Oooh, she can be nasty.

So I want to ask you....

Do you love yourself? I mean really love your insides? Do you have a nurturing part of yourself that takes care of the more sensitive and tender You? I invite you to share with me....what do you do to really take care of all the different parts of yourself that so crave your attention?

Pluck the last petal for your beloved You.

Insectia

2010-08-06T18:45:00.000-07:00

What would it be like to be so tiny that you could nap the afternoon away on a bed of duckweed, as the gentle lapping of the water's edge lulled you to dream?

What would it be like to know that you are connected to ancient ancestors that go back 300 million years?

How would it feel to have a jeweled body of vibrant blue and wings made of nature's finest lace?

Or to have 1000 eyes to behold the world and its wonders?

Wouldn't it be amazing to be a nymph of the water world before becoming airborne? What would that first take off feel like?

How exquisite it would be to set your toes on the velvety softness of a flower petal and drink its sweet nectar.

Or to be called a name as sweet as *damselfly*

Road Trippin

2010-07-12T17:52:00.000-07:00

Nothing screams summer like a good road trip. My mom and I took one together...just us girls. We were on our way to visit my brother and his family, but we took some roads through the southern interior of B.C. that I have never seen before.

We visited small towns that looked so romantically picturesque, I wanted to move right into this seemingly simple lifestyle. Of course, I conveniently forgot how isolated these places are in the winter. We walked down streets, ice cream cones in hand as we admired character homes and funky shops. As we continued down the highway, we gasped as we saw three black bears in three different locations. We stopped next to bridges to take pictures of overflowing rivers running high with spring's mountain thaw. We visited friendly horses and gave them handfuls of grasses in exchange for a picture or two. We crossed a river on a cable ferry that looked as though it came from another time and place. The beauty of this landscape was breathtaking and inspiring. Powerful transformations can burst inside of you when you experience a place that is new to your eyes.

I loved spending this time with my mom. We have always been close, but there is something special about taking a road trip together. We were like Thelma and Louise without the crazy....on the road, feeling free from responsibility and regularity for a little while. We had so much time to talk and muse about where we are in this particular point in our lives. I felt as though I was given a gift....this uninterrupted time with a woman so dear to me. I am so deeply grateful for the connection that we have, and will never forget this adventure we shared.

A picture perfect way to start the summer. I hope this summer feels as stretched out and endless as it did when I was a kid. Maybe the key is to savour every moment so that every day feels full and satisfying...not just when you are on vacation, but when you are living your daily life. Live it like you are on vacation.

Here's to longer days and warm dreamy nights sugared with the scents of summer blooms and ocean breezes. I think it's time to cut the watermelon.

Flower Games

2010-06-23T11:53:00.000-07:00

I got a new lens last weekend. A 50mm 1.4. It is now my most favourite lens, and I think the flowers liked it too. I wandered funky neighbourhoods with old colourful houses, and saw many interesting things, but it was the flowers that charmed me this day.

They seemed a bit reckless as they were trying to escape their confining yards. Reaching over fences, sneaking out between the openings, stretching out their limbs as though they were challenging each other to a contest to see who could reach out to the sidewalk the farthest.

A flower riot. That is what it was. Quiet but colourful chaos.

An Open Window

2010-06-17T11:35:00.001-07:00

There is an old abandoned shed near my house that I have been watching for quite some time now. I noticed that the house on the property seemed to be vacant, and one day as I was passing by, I saw a man doing some work on an old car there. I approached him and asked if I could come and take some pictures of the crumbling shed. He told me to come soon because the house and surrounding structures were about to be demolished to make way for a new subdivision. The elderly couple that had lived in the house recently passed away, and he was there to take care of the remaining odds and ends.

So I waited some more. I'm not sure why. I think that even though I received a warm welcome to enter the property, some part of me still felt as though I was trespassing. And each day, as I passed by, I felt as though I was going to lose something if I didn't get in there. So, on an overcast afternoon, shyly aware that the neighbours might be eyeing me suspiciously, I gathered up my gear and my courage and went in.

This place was nothing short of fascinating. The roof has completely caved in on one side, and as I peered through the open window, I could see piles of wood and old junk, shelves with old canning jars, and one lonely light bulb hanging from a wire in the center. I wonder what it was used for? I suspect this elderly couple had grandchildren, as there was a rocking horse painted on one outside wall. Maybe the jars were placed there by a little girl playing house, once upon a time.

My favourite though, was the outside. The weathered walls were covered in green....moss and ivy. The paint was peeling and wearing away. And the window...oh, I gasped when I saw the window. It too was blanketed in green, with mossy cobwebs and the most beautiful rusty spiral latch.

I think a lot of love went into creating this place some time ago. And over the years, sadly, it could not be taken care of. A reminder to me that nothing is permanent. That change comes in with the wind, whether we like it or not. And although I am someone who struggles with change, this little shed with its whimsical window latches inspired me to make a change to my blog. And that is why I used it for my header. A window, open and accepting of the natural laws of change and renewal.

And it isn't just the look of my blog that is evolving. My new website is now online. Take a visit and be sure to check out the *paws and whiskers* gallery. I discovered a new love for taking pictures of people's pets!
The look of The Four is also transforming into something beautiful and new. We have moved away from the square picture format, so that we can be more free to express ourselves creatively in other ways. This past post was breathtaking.

I will be sad when they tear down that old shed and build some generic cookie cutter houses in that beautiful space. But I am so glad I wandered in, and was able to absorb a bit of the story of that place before it is lost forever. It was loved in its time. And I will always love the images I captured on that wistful melancholy day.

To Be a Grasshopper

2010-06-06T11:05:00.000-07:00

I've been a tree hugger since an early age. My backyard was a forest of pine... old stumps became kitchen sinks, chunks of moss made a velvety carpet under my toes, and blankets and dolls were dragged across the crumbly forest floor as I set up house amongst the towering turrets.

If I wasn't in the trees, I was edging the pond, capturing tadpoles to bring home as pets, anxious to see if tiny legs would sprout and fish would turn to frog.

Oh, and the caterpillars and ladybugs. How I adored these creatures...feeling so protective as I gave them new jar homes and fed them grass and clover...even if the caterpillars never morphed into butterflies before I set them free and the ladybugs eventually flew away...I enjoyed their short stay, and hoped that they appreciated my hospitality.

How comforting it is to know that even now, as a big kid, I can still plant myself in the middle of a meadow and be consumed with my simple surroundings for an hour or more and not realise how much time has passed. My toys might be more expensive, as camera lenses and tripods have replaced Cabbage Patch dolls and plastic dishes. But the time spend in nature, the fueling of the imagination, and the simple bliss of an uncomplicated afternoon makes me feel like a child again.

Wind, Sand and Dance

2010-05-27T22:28:00.000-07:00

A little spontaneous magic appeared before me on the beach. This sweet couple just dropped their things in the sand and started dancing...their music of choice, surf and wind...their love for each other was unmistakable.

When you stumble upon moments such as these, when you don't see them coming, and they just quietly present themselves to you, how can you not feel that the beauty in this world is absolutely everywhere, and hopelessly uncontainable? Life is SO BEAUTIFUL.

I can't help but think about my brother when I watch this movie. As an artist, he is always seeking new ways to explore the world around him. He is in the midst of a creative project. He has decided to fall into silence for an unknown period of time and learn to communicate with the people around him in different ways....deeper ways...connecting without the distraction of language. It must be challenging. And he is no doubt learning a great deal about himself in the process.

And even though I am not in silence myself, I find myself noticing how much more there is to connecting that goes so much deeper than simply conversing through words. I watched these two dancing and not only did I get a sense of how they felt for each other, just by the way they were moving with each other...but I could also feel myself connecting to them as I shared this fleeting moment with them on the beach. And if it were possible to actually see connection in a tangible way, I believe I would have seen strings joining this couple to everyone that surrounded them on the beach that day.

How many people strolling the beach paused to watch their graceful twirls? How many smiled and felt a wave of love pass through them? Am I the only one that passed this story along? Who else on the beach was moved by this beauty and felt a subtle rush of seeing something extraordinary?

What a wonderful feeling... to be a part of something... a connection among a beach of strangers.
Not one word spoken. And through this experience I gain some understanding about my brother and why he feels the need to find meaning in the silence. There are as many ways to connect as there are drops in that magnificent ocean...language is only one of them.

Trail Blazing

2010-04-21T09:40:00.000-07:00

Never follow someone else's path;
it doesn't work the same way twice for anyone...
the path follows you and rolls up behind you
as you walk, forcing the next person
to find their own way.

~J Michael Straczynski

Ain't that the truth.

I have been away, treading some new paths, busy as a summer bee.
That letter I wrote to Fear gave me my power back, and I feel I have the upper hand...for now.

I have decided to put 100% of my energy towards growing my little photography business. It is time to take a few giant leaps of faith. I have been taking the slow and steady safe route for long enough, with slow and steady success, but I need to come out of my turtle shell and become more known as a photographer. I am ready. And I feel more sure about it than I ever have before. It's quite astounding what can happen in your life when you put fear in its proper place....in a little box on the shelf where it can be seen and acknowledged, but completely contained.

So, I am ferociously working at my computer, any free moment I can capture, while the dishes pile up in the sink and the garden fills up with weeds, and my life becomes a bit unbalanced...for the short term.

And you, my dear dear friends. I think about you all the time, even though I am not visiting much. Please forgive me for being such a stranger. I am a sporadic blogger at the best of times, but during this time, I need to stay focused and on track so I can have everything ready for the spring and summer photography season. I am creating a whole new look for myself...new logo and website... and when it is ready, I can't wait to share it with you! I will try to pop in from time to time to say hi and see what is new and beautiful in your world. I do not want to lose my connections with all of you who keep me inspired and full of love for life.

I haven't been a complete stranger. Earlier this month I was given the opportunity to write a guest post over at Relyn's beautiful blog. What fun! I have never done that before. She is filling the month of April with passions, and if you know this beautiful soul, you know that she is glowing with passion, no matter what she is doing in her life. I just adore her. And I thank her so much for inviting me to share one of my passions.

There is so much to do.... but the excitement inside of me is keeping me going. So I must get back to work, for the path ahead of me is full of unknown twists and turns...but it is looking exceptionally green, I must say.

Much love and well wishes to you all.
I will see you soon.
xoxoxoxoxo

Dear Fear...

2010-03-23T13:54:00.000-07:00

I know that you are there.
And I know that you are too stubborn to leave me alone.

But I also know that you reside inside my brain.
And the bigger, more powerful part of me resides within my heart, the source of love and all good things. And that part of me is even strong enough to love you.
Because in a lot of respects, you can be my ally.
You tell me where the danger is, and you help me to avoid catastrophe.

But...I have learned that sometimes, my well being is not in your best interest. Sometimes, when my heart feels strong, and I am full of passion for what I am doing in my life you will do whatever it takes to fill my brain with doubt.
You deceive me.
Sometimes I don't catch it right away and I fall for your tricks.

But not today.

So, Fear.... I'm sorry I don't have more time for chit chat. I need to put my work boots on and start building my dream.

So move over and stop buzzing in my ear like a pesky little mosquito.

Or I'll squish you.

Interlude

2010-03-07T14:48:00.000-08:00

Go gently into the next hour and see what becomes of it.
What is calling to your senses?

Catch the eye....

The tulip trees are blooming. I saw one yesterday with pink blossoms the size of small cabbages! More bloom than branch.

Have you ever looked deeply into your own eyes through a mirror? How intricate and complex the colours are.

Listen in...

Slip into a bubble bath and imagine a miniature tap class as the tiny bubbles pitter patter all around you. Sink under the surface and listen to your heart's rhythm. It is telling you how much it loves you.

Indulge in a nap and take notice at the way things sound so far away as you drift into dream.

When your cat purrs next to you, tell me it doesn't make you feel reassured...that all is well in this moment...this delicious hour.

Breathe deeply...

Smell the soft sweet fragrance of cherry blossom, or the ocean salt, or the fresh white breath of snow.

What particular scent can rouse your nostalgic memory? lavender....crisp clean sheets....manderin oranges...lilacs...a pot of pasta sauce bubbling and burbling...spring rain.

All in good taste...

Squish a caramel on your tongue. Crush a grape...a pomegranate seed and savour the flavourburst. Absorb the sugary sand of a pear.

Warm cookies and milk...can anything in the world comfort like this combination can? Especially when the chocolate chips are still melty and all over your fingers gooey.

Connect through touch...

Pluck a magnolia from its reaching limb and sweep its delicate petals across your cheek...a blooming kiss.

Let the wind play with your hair, let the waves chase your feet, let the rain tickle the tip top of your head, let the sun warm you from the outside in.

In awe...

Don't forget to engage your sense of wonder as you bring into awareness this hour and all of its gentle enticements... this beautiful hour that can feel eternal when you succumb to the richness of the world around you.

The Humble Acorn

2010-02-27T10:56:00.000-08:00

You know how it is. Sometimes you just run out of ideas to blog about. So, during one of these void-in-the-brain episodes, I asked a friend to give me a random word and I would write a post about it. She said,

"Oh, I don't know.......... acorn."

And the void was quickly filling in with all kinds of random thoughts.

I thought I could tell you about the beautiful photo I recently saw on the front cover of a book with a new tree sprouting out of a split acorn. It was exquisite. And I will always wonder how the photographer captured that gem. Was it a set up? Or did someone actually stumble upon this miracle in the natural world?

I could tell you how funny it was that just a few days after I was offered this word, it showed up on a license plate on the car in front of me. Why would someone have the word acorn on their license plate??? What are the chances that I would happen to see it?

I could tell you stories about this sweet little squirrel (portrait above) who I made friends with during a trip to Long Beach last year.

I could talk about something deep and profound. The symbolism of the acorn. New beginnings and such.

But really, I shamelessly admit that all I can think about is the poor little critter and his relentless quest to attain his most precious beloved, yet elusive acorn in this scene from Ice Age 2. I saw this in a packed theater some time ago and had one of those torturous moments where I could not hold in my laughter. The scene wasn't even the funniest scene, but at that moment, for me and no one else, it became unbearably funny. When everyone else stopped laughing, I found myself suffocating, trying desperately to hold it in which makes you feel like you are going to burst into an embarrassing explosion of furious laughter, drawing unwanted attention to yourself.

We've all had them.
My favourite is when you see a newsperson trying to keep it together during a live broadcast. And the harder he tries to stay serious, the more likely it is that he is going to fall apart. If he only had the freedom to just get it out, the humour would quickly fade and normalcy would take it's rightful place once again.

Nothing is more agonizing than trying to supress an outburst when it is not appropriate to laugh. It's kind of like being tickled. A seemingly good feeling that is SO VERY NOT!

All of this over an innocent, unassuming little acorn.

Cinnamon Hearts

2010-02-14T12:19:00.001-08:00

Love has no desire but to fulfill itself.
To melt and be like a running brook
that sings its melody to the night.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart
and give thanks for another day of loving.

~Kahlil Gibran

If I Was....

2010-02-11T13:00:00.000-08:00

a month.... October

a day.... a rainy Saturday

an adjective.... free

a colour.... sea glass

a flower.... poppy

a musical instrument.... wind chimes

a fruit.... starfruit

a shoe.... flip flop

a planet... saturn doing the hula hoop

a taste.... salty sweet

an emotion.... sensitive

a song.... Alive by Edwin

a store.... Pink Sugar cupcakery

a book.... Romancing the Ordinary~ Breathnach

a scent.... vanilla bean

a tool.... telescope

a tree.... maple

a creature...mason bee

a verb.... love

For Relyn. Thank you for the inspiration.

I Took a Breather

2010-02-01T11:49:00.000-08:00

Some fresh air will do you good. Really.

I haven't been blogging for over three weeks. I haven't been climbing my mountain for over three months. For a while now I have been directing so much of my energy towards my outer realms....making room for deepening connections....that it's almost as though my inner planet has tilted off its axis. And while I have been aware of this for some time (finding a balance between what I need inwardly and what I need outwardly has always been a struggle), it wasn't until I tied my laces and headed for the mountain this morning, that I realised how far off track I had actually wandered.

Immediately I noticed a welcome committee of birdsong, and I could almost hear the trees whispering where have you been? We missed you. As I moved deeper into the woods and up the familiar slopes I felt as though I was being hugged by an old friend. It felt so good to be back.

A few months ago, I started to feel apathetic about climbing my mountain. I began to get bored, which has never happened to me in the eight years I have been climbing. This really bothered me because I knew it was an important part of my day to come and find my inner spaces. It wasn't just a good work out for me...it was a daily meditation that centered me for the rest of the day.

But sometimes I think we need to take a break from things to really find our appreciation for them again. I didn't want to come back until I was truly ready to make a commitment to myself, and climb daily. So when I returned this morning, I knew, without a doubt that it was time. It felt so good to be there. What was too familiar and commonplace a few months ago was now beautifully familiar and comforting now. I found myself pausing in certain places, just so I could look around and breathe it all in again. The old knotted oak trees are covered in a flourescent aqua marine lichen...the hillsides are bright green with moss and new grasses...baby leaves are sprouting from branches, slowly filling in the empty spaces that Autumn left behind.

As I walk out of these spaces, and back into the busy world, I walk down a path under a tunnel of tree branches and it feels like I am emerging out of a womb. I am leaving the quiet forest where I have room to think and be with the gentle rhythms of nature, and moving back into the daily busyness of living and doing.

It really is a different world on that mountain. Within that mountain. And it has everything to do with how and when I come here to write. Many of my thoughts are gathered there. Most often, I write my posts just after I have climbed, when my energy is high, and my creativity is flowing, sometimes overflowing.

And I feel ready to be here once again. Writing and sharing, taking pictures of beautiful things, visiting with you, reading your words and ideas, being inspired by your creative lives. I cannot do these things if I am not in touch with my insides. I have strayed too long, and had to set my planet back on its proper axis. What a difference a little bit of fresh air will do you.

Breathe deeply.

Quiet Potential

2010-01-11T12:26:00.001-08:00

Of winter's lifeless world each tree
Now seems a perfect part;
Yet each one holds summer's secret
Deep down within its heart.

~Charles G. Stater

The blogging part of me has been hibernating, while the other parts of me have been richly engaged with life.

I think this is going to be a year of movement. Good change. Although, I hope it is slow and gentle, like the gradual evolution of a tree through the cyclical seasons.

The frost is melting from the parts of me that wish to hide. I can feel the buds emerging, some of them opening early to take a peek at what's to come. I have grown too big for the bud. I need more room. More space to grow. More light. My roots have deepened and now it's time for my world to open up a little bit more to the unknown...to the things that have yet to manifest.

I feel something deep within myself awakening... Summer's secret is full of possibility.

Lil Sweet Pea

2009-12-30T22:06:00.001-08:00

This little being enchanted every warm and fuzzy particle of my heart all week.

My mom got her the soft fluffy rug and I got her the little knit hat...and for weeks I have been waiting to combine all these elements into a photo session with my niece Sarai.

But this was no easy task! I needed a team of loving and patient kin to make this happen. Trying to keep her on the rug, with the hat on was immensely temporary. Every time we put her down, she would start crawling toward the camera at speeds I hadn't seen her obtain before (I think it's because she is happiest and most free in her birthday suit). And it looked so funny through the lens... these bright happy blue eyes getting bigger and bigger in my frame as she smiled and reached for my camera...I couldn't stop laughing, which made my eyes water and everything was a crazy high paced blur...which made it all the funnier!

But I did capture her. I caught a few tiny precious precious moments before she pulled her hat off by the strings for the hundredth time, before she scrambled off in another direction, squealing with mischievious delight.

The next time I see her she will be walking. She will be a whole other new little being, with new mannerisms and funny little ways about her to adore and absorb into memory. And as sure as stars twinkle, I will be watching her through my lens, trying to capture a part of her that will never grow up...that will stay contained in that little photograph... to help me remember what she was like at that transient age, when she tugged at another of my many heart strings inscribed with her name.

Noel

2009-12-20T08:44:00.000-08:00

It all begins for me tomorrow as I make my way inland where the snow is thick and billowy, and the cold air flirts with my blushing cheeks.

The coming days promise me...

Cozy gatherings with the ones I hold most dear to me....baby kisses and cuddles and snuggles. My little niece's first Christmas. Oh my soul...I can hardly contain the love.

A Skating party on a frozen lake, roasted marshmallows and crackling flame.

Snowboarding down powdery slopes and soaks in natural hot springs...caves and all.

New wanderings through an adorable little town that is new to me and my camera. This place is known for its cute little cafes and shops. It is a mecca for artists and creative visionaries, free thinkers and environmentally sensitive souls.

What pieces of these sweet days will I capture? What stories will present themselves to me? What new memories will I tuck away for safe keeping inside my heart's treasure box?

And what about your precious heart? May it be delighted by all things sparkly...sugared stars through frost bitten windows...peppermint swizzle stix dipped in hot chocolatey mugs....manderin scents and gingerbread crunches...dusted tree tops...knitted hats and mittens with strings...a snowflake softly falling...
falling...
a small offering, a token of peace.

And love.
You are so very loved.
xo

Sweet December

2009-12-15T11:19:00.000-08:00

Remember
This December
That love weighs more than gold!

~Josephine Dodge Daskam Bacon

Simply Beautiful

2009-12-08T12:39:00.001-08:00

I thought I would share with you some of the moments of beauty that I captured and tucked into my soul pockets over the last several days...

~ I woke up the other morning to the most gorgeous ray of winter sunrise flowing through my bedroom windows. It looked as though a soft incandescent lamp was lit in the corner, embracing the entire room in a warm glow. It was so alluring, I ended up falling back into my bed so that I could be hugged by this light for a few more moments.

~ I watched a young man walk across a busy street holding a cane and wearing a top hat. It was like being tossed backward in time. What was even more beautiful was observing the looks of curiosity and wonderment by the surrounding people as he passed them by. It's quite amazing that a simple top hat can unite a group of strangers.

~ I looked up and saw 23 seagulls gliding silently together in the dark sky. The clouds behind them were charcoal grey but the sun was illuminating their still bodies and motionless wings.

~ While sitting in a restaurant, I witnessed a man losing all sense of the world around him as he shared a secret moment with his nine day old baby girl. He was oblivious to his surroundings as he held her and made funny faces at her while she stared back at him, her eyes big, blue and wide open.

~ I rode on the most gorgeous carousel, and as I sat upon my gentle giraffe and watched the world spin round and round, I noticed that there was only one child turning with me...the rest of the riders were adults, seeking to reclaim a lost part of their childhood, laughing and giggling, their faces beaming as they turned in dancing circles.

~ In the night, while the wind was howling, I held a tiny hummingbird in my hands as I helped it escape a moment of sleepy disorientation. How delicate and completely beautiful he was in his papery lightness and fragility. A precious moment I will never forget.

~ Standing before the sea, I gasped as I saw a large fish leap, three times, out of the water and splash down. Was he fleeing from a bigger hungry fish or was he playing? Do fish play? When they dart every which way in their silvery shimmering schools, do they feel the bliss of the ability to move so freely through the water?

I saw so many beautiful things. And as long as I have eyes to see with and a heart to feel with, I will always look for the beautiful.

I am...

2009-11-30T11:11:00.001-08:00

I am...

...turning 36 on Thursday, and while my body is starting to feel grumpier as I stumble dizzily out of bed in the mornings, my mind feels like it has never aged a day past 12.

...a believer in way too many things that really aren't true, and not enough things that are worthy of believing. I need to get that bumper sticker that says *you don't have to believe everything you think* and stick it on my bathroom mirror as a constant reminder.
Which reminds me of another bumper sticker I saw once that said *I believe in dragons, good men and other fantasy creatures.* lol!

...incapable of keeping succulents alive. I either water them too little (cause I think that they are designed to be neglected) and they shrivel up into nothingness, or I water them too much (cause I don't want another brown shriveled plant) and they fall over in their heaviness and snap. It shouldn't be that difficult, really.

...a tear factory when I cry AND when I laugh. I walk out of funny movies and live comedy gigs looking like a train wreck.

...a child again when I smell play-doh, crayons, cut grass, pumpkin guts, cedar or douglas fir, and when I hear approaching trains, eerie wind sounds through door cracks or *Stayin Alive*.

...constantly at war with the part of myself that yearns for connection and the other part of me that craves solitude. I am a social introvert.

...contradictory in other ways too... I am always cold but I hate the heat. I am a lefty when I write and draw and a righty when I play golf or tennis or hockey (which is almost never) and ambidextrous when I type.

...wistful, emotional and goosebumpy and often moved to tears when I hear this piece of music. The full version is a sweeping, soaring 24 minutes and evokes in me flashes of euphoric imagery, like cryptic fragmented scenes from a dream that you can't quite grasp, but you can feel.

...always traveling to the same places when I dream, although the events are different. These are always places that involve water...the same lake, strong raging river, waterslide or even a ski hill.

...tickled green blue and orange by the serendipitious accident that happened over at The Four yesterday. Read the words under the second set of pictures and you will see what I mean.

This is where I am at 35 and 362/365 years of age.

The Weight of the Ocean

2009-11-22T19:55:00.000-08:00

Gravity is a funny thing.

You would think that if it can hold down and contain something as immense and heavy as the ocean, then the force of gravity should be so powerful that we should have difficulty just lifting a foot off the ground!

How is it that we can freely run and jump, leap and vault ourselves into the air despite the constant pull and not one drop of that giant ocean escapes?

You would think that the heavier the object, the more it could resist gravity's stronghold... while feathers would have to be pried off the ground with a great deal of oomph.

I don't care for the boring scientific explanation for all of this. It's just the child in me following a brainstorm.

Reluctance

2009-11-14T22:46:00.000-08:00

It's not ready to let go... to find its place amongst the others, strewn across well worn paths, draped over ferns and fallen logs, soggy with November rain. Not prepared to hear itself crunch and crumble underfoot. Not ready to dissolve into a million tiny pieces and become a part of the earth, even if it will enrich the soil and nourish new growth.

Not yet.

It is caught between two universes. No longer bound to the tree, not yet part of the underground. Untethered. Free.

Is it asking for a second chance at life? A different view of the world from a brand new perspective? Is it wishing for a place to catch a few beams of warmth as the sun passes low through the barren wood?
Maybe it wants to be moved by the wind just one more time... to dance into a swirly gust and finally, on its own terms... gracefully accept its fate.

Star Fish

2009-11-05T10:51:00.001-08:00

Sometimes I don't have a whole lot to say.

Silent as a starfish.
Yet reaching out, linking arms, seeking connection.

Peacefully aware that, in this deep sea of quietness,
I am still a part of a larger constellation.

Light on Dark

2009-10-29T11:58:00.000-07:00

It's almost as though it is trying to capture all the light it can before the day fades away into night. I can imagine, it slowly closes its petals and wraps itself around those collected sun rays, huddling into a tight bud to keep warm. Until the sun rises again.

While most living beings seek out and thrive in the light, I think there is much to be said for the darkness too...

Candlelight would lose its warmth if it wasn't swaddled by the night's heavy arms.

There would be no wishing on the afterglow of falling stars and no tracing satellites as they glide across the sky. The ooh's and ahh's of meteor showers would be silenced. Aurora Borealis would shy away, feeling as though her true colours were unnoticed.
The man in the moon would be lonely indeed.

Ghost stories around a campfire would lose their fright. And trick or treating would not be the same on a sunny summer evening. The spooky atmosphere, with moonlit bare branches and flying broomstick sightings would be lost. Jack O Lanterns would have no personality and would turn into mere carved pumpkins that even Cinderella would disapprove of.

I am no vampire, no nightcrawler, no nocturnal creature of the night...but I celebrate the darkness, for it has its mysterious charms.